Maybe he won't find out what I know

where would we be now? D:

2010-02-02T02:15:00.000-08:00

Okay readers :D. Quick post before studying Chemistry. I'm totally determined to do well, and not let down anyone. Anyway, today was coolio. Apart from the fact that I suffered from constipation LOL. Blah. Okay, yeah, I got constipation. happy? Stupid Jowell. Hmph. Alright, nothing much interesting to report. Dylan was majorly pissing me off by singing Viva La Vida in class, and his singing ain't bad, LOL. HAHAHAH.

PE WAS DAMN COOLIO LUHS. But i tugged my hamstring-OUCH- and wasn't allowed to do PE or CCA for this whole week. AHHAHAHAHAHA NO WAY IN HELL AM I MISSING DRAMA ON THURSDAY. Bleah. So i practically sat down and stared at Jianyi's class. LOL. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAA. Anyway, I'mma gonna change blog URL soon. I realized I did 250+ posts on this blog URL O: so yeah, I'mma still renovating, but you can check it out. Mostly the craps are the same as featured here, but I like the blogskin. Constructive critique appreciated on THIS cbox :D. Hahah. Loveya, bitches.

P.S. LATEST LOVED SONGS. ;D.

Where Would We Be Now - Good Charlotte.♥

Yule Shoot Your Eyes Out - Fall Out Boy.♥

Shinobi VS. Dragon Ninja - Lostprophets.♥

P.P.S.

I had to add this. This was just so true.

GOOD CHARLOTTE LYRICS
"Where Would We Be Now"
I smile, you laugh, I look away
I sigh, you ask me why, I say,
It's ok and I am just feeling' down
Your hand on mine I hear the words
If only love had found us first,
Our lives they would be different, oh
So I stand and wait, I am just a man, oh

Where would we be now baby,
If we found each other first,
Where would we be now baby,

And now I must confess, that I'm a sinking ship
And I'm anchored by the weight of my heart
Cause it's filled with these feelings
But I keep my true thoughts locked, beside my hearts black box
And it won't be found, it won't survive through the smoke or the wreckage
So I crash and burn, I got a lot of things to learn, oh

Where would we be now baby,
If we found each other first
What would you do now darling,
If I said these simple words
I'll wait, I'll wait
As long as you want
But where would we be now baby

I'll wait, I'll wait

Where would we be now baby,
If we found each other first
What would you do now darling,
If I said these simple words
I'll wait, I'll wait
As long as you want
But where would we be now baby
I'll wait, I'll wait, I'll wait, I'll wait

2010-01-28T05:46:00.001-08:00

i know, i know that i should be studying now, but i just had to let off everything i feel, somewhere. did he know, did he know, how much it hurt?

i'm a gay. i cry easily. sigh. i hurt easily too. and i have to study, therefore see you.

senile dementia :/

2010-01-25T06:24:00.000-08:00

it's times like this where i feel truly alone, and i don't dare to confide in anyone. it makes me feel upset really, and it hurts so much. because yes, i am truly alone. sigh.. i miss a lot of people suddenly, but i guess i shouldn't mention names. today was fun, albeit my super moody exterior, it was admittedly fun.

JIAN LI ACKNOWLEDGED ME :O OKAY RANDOM LOL. we were walking down, he was behind, then he was like, "HEY IS THAT AUDREY :O. hi how you manz?"

LOL THATS SOUNDS SO ALVIN -.-

DRAMA WAS COOL :O although i got seperated from my lovely fiancee; Hazel Magic Mushroom~ but it's still cool. LOL. we did some political crappychamacallit. seperated into muslims and christians. :O then alvin made us seem like gay christians because he didn't let us fight back with the muslims. so we ran like cowards, darren kept insisting we must stand there and fight. and we even came up with the "V" formation thing. LOL. HAHAHAH HE WAS DAMN FUNNY CRAP LUHS HAHAHAH :D. then alvin was damn epic -.- kept insisting this that all cannot. FAIL LA.

but overall damn funny. HAHAHHAHA DARREN GO TIAO LOU (Y). okay now no time le i go sleep le bye ~ LOVED.

is this true, i don'tknow what to think..

2010-01-24T06:13:00.000-08:00

yes. people. i love hanguang. thats true.

THERE. now that i've got it out, i can speak freely about him. he's lovely. he's absolutely wonderful. he's fantastic. and i wanna use lyrics to say what i feel, because i'm a copydog o.o LOL. i mean these..

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

This emptiness is killing me
And I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Looking back I realize
It was always there just never spoken
I'm waiting here...been waiting here

I don't want another pretty face
I don't want just anyone to hold
I don't want my love to go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul
You're the one I wanna chase
You're the one I wanna hold
I wont let another minute go to waste
I want you and your beautiful soul

I know that you are something special
To you I'd be always faithful
I want to be what you always needed
Then I hope you'll see the heart in me

Staring out at the rain with a heavy heart
It's the end of the world in my mind
Then your voice pulls me back like a wake up call
I've been looking for the answer
Somewhere
I couldn't see that it was right there
But now I know what I didn't know

Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky

It's alright, I survived, I'm alive again
Cuz of you, made it through every storm
What is life, what's the use if you're killing time
I'm so glad I found an angel
Someone
Who was there when all my hopes fell
I wanna fly, looking in your eyes

Because you live there's a reason why
I carry on when I lose the fight
I want to give what you've given me always

That you were romeo,you were throwing
pebbles
And my daddy said to stay away from juliet
And i was crying on the staircase
Begging you please don't go, and i said

Romeo take me somewhere where we can be alone
I'll be waiting all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and i'll be the princess
It's a love story baby just say yes

We're no strangers to love
You know the rules a
And so do I
A full commitments
What I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get
This from any other girl

I just wanna tell you
How I'm feeling
Gotta make you understand

Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around
And desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie
And hurt you

We've know
Each other for so long
Your heart's been aching
But you're too shy
To say it
Inside we both know
What's been going on
We know the game
And we're gonna play it.

YES, I'M THE WORLD'S LUCKIEST PERSON HAHAHAHAH :D.

epic:D

2010-01-22T17:46:00.000-08:00

i'm a notariously sadistic person. sadistic over myself. but really,

what would you do, if you love the person thats hurting you ?

edward cullen, much. hahah, but it's true. i believe that i really really love him, and the feelings are reciprocated. anyway, i truly love him. thankheavens that i met him. thankheavens for everything i ever ever had. and I used to think that I only wanted what I can't have, therefore I liked him so much last time. Now i realized, that this was indefinitely not true, to the extremes.

because when you honestly truly love somebody, his imperfections are more than perfect to you, it's just him. when you're hurt by him, just so you know, it's probably 101% your fault. sigh audrey, sigh. but don't hurt already, because you know you've got what you need that you want.

okay yeah i'm aware i'm talking crap in an ice-cream cone Dx

but i feel from a hole in the cloud in the sky, so i don't care. :D

anyway, yessssss i had fun in drama :D. I like the sec 1s, they actually quite friendly yayness. so far i've only seen 2 though; Zhangle(111) and Vicky(109) junior wooooootz. Just that this year's 109 damn guaikia and not tablet PC. I remember last year my class was the most notorious one amongst teachers and students alike D:

AND WHERE ARE YOU, SAMUEL?! I THOUGHT YOU COMING DRAMA?! DDDDDDDDDDDDDD:

you cheat on me huh D: blah.

and we'll kiss the ground whenever we touch back down~

2010-01-17T00:33:00.000-08:00

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. these few days, I'mma quite quite quite happy. :D. I believe this is the first 3 days, that I never cried once at all. can you believe it. xD. Cuz maybe i might like-like someone, hahah. and that someone's just so special~ :X. he makes me happy, hahah. he's why i won't cry, and i believe i won't for a long long time, i hope.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSS YOU KNOW WHAT I'M NOT SINGLE ANYMORE.

"the number you have called is currently unavailable, pl0x try again later~" LOL.

Anyway, let's talk about today cuz I forgot the main points of the last few days apart from the fact that I went to the library with hanguang! okayokay :D. that day was lovely luhs, hahah. UNTIL SOME SUCKER CALLED AUDREY SCREWED IT UP T.T. and I cannot remember anything more about that day, so let's talk about today. YESSSS LOVELY TUITION. Gangan come back already yay so i don't feel bored. :DDDDDDDDDDDD.

-he says my new hairstyle looks nice, which is like omgwtfbbqsauces DDDDDDD:-

ITS NOT TRUE MY HAIRSTYLE EPIC FAIL OMG I GO CRY T.T

okay anyway, yaaaaaaaaaaay today I saw Andrew again. he came to our class. AND OMG HE'S IN RAFFLES INSTITUITION'S DEBATE TEAM :O. we spent half the time talking about the motion LOLWUT. I don't even know whether I'm going for the MJC debate, BUT I WANNAAAAAAAAA. can see Andrew in the RI uniform LOL. and he's damn epic nice okay D: his sister is called Audrey too LOOOOOOL. but please don't xiang wai he's not my type k thanks :D.

he's too genius and his engreesh so chim until he say singlish with an angmorh accent ohmygawd DDDDDDD:

-hey i do that too LOL-

AND HE WANTED TO INSULT ME 5 TIMES -.- but he apparently; held himself back because he was scared i'd cry. LOLWUT he epic.

nvm anyway why am i talking about him -.-! okay then had tuition sian. then came back home. yay. the end. :D here i am posting about my currently happy happy life :D. nvm i realized i became a lousy blogger after my long pause from blogging D:. haiiiiiiiiiya okay i'll try my best.

Zonghan = horny kid(????????!) Truth/False?

Nvm i feel like a sucker cuz I realized I blog like shit. Okay let's think back to yesterday. I SPRAINED MY WRIST AT FENCING WALAOOOOOOOOOOOO. some stupid idiotic make up lesson guy sat on my hand after i tripped on my fencing foil. and i don't even know if it's purplely or accidentally cuz i was effing goddamned crying DDDDDDDD: my god it ****ing hurt like crap omg i was sure i heard my wrist crack T.T but it can't be that bad cuz now i don't need a bandage already :D.

-yes i heal pretty quickly physically, on the other hand i heal very very terribly slowly mentally.-

so please don't hurt me :(

okay i wanna go study already. i is now a nerd. so byebye :DDDDDDD.

YOU KNOW YOU LOVE ME;

audrey~

from now on, we are enemies..

2010-01-10T01:38:00.000-08:00

FROM NOW ON, WE ARE ENEMIES.

I don't believe you did that, honestly. I thought that we were... Great friends. But I guess, it's true. And I really hope that it is true that "You don't really know what you've got till it's gone.".... It must be true, I guess. I'mma gonna give you a choice, cuz I'mma know you're gonna see it. So exactly, Edward,

Did you mean it, or not?

Anyway, I'mma over you. I can live, with or without you Edward, it doesn't make any difference anymore. Anyway, why should I waste my time on you anymore. I have friends Edward. You must be such an idiot to think I can't live without you.

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG I SAW HIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. Anyway, before tuition, I was thinking whether Jingyuan'd recognize me from the other day LOL. Then the second I saw him, I forgot to ask LOLOLOL. So retarded. TODAY GAN NEVER COME WALAO I EMO I SAD D:. And today our classroom became super uber crowded, cuz got many people that didn't come before, HAHAHAH. Sian today so sian I saw Joel he looks retarded as ever.

HAHAHA OKAY, I KNOW I'M BEING MEAN BUT HE'S MEAN TO GAN ALSO K :( So i believe staunchly that I have the right to stick up for my favourite teacher ever D:. Anyway, so far the peoples I know from tuition would be.....

Me, myself, of course :DDDDD. Teh Best :D. -nanhuazhongxue-
Shisien~~~~~~~~~~~~ Yessssssssss :D. She's super nice. -Bukit panjang government high-
Some girl IDK LOL. -fairfield methodist-
some guy IDK -Anglo-chinese independent- :OOOOOOOO
leezonghan xP -fairfield methodist-
daryl chan -anglo-chinese independent- :O
Joel -zhonghua secondary?-
Jingyuan -hwachonginternational- .............
Jianli(?) -nanhuazhongxue; 210; NPCC-

LOOOOOOOOOOOOL. SO COOL I GOT A NANHUA FRIEND IN NEWTON APPS :D. okay, not exactly friend, but he seems like a nice person luhs :D. Anyway, today Mr Gan didn't come so Miss Lim took over. She's quite a nice teacher :D. So we did the direct and inverse proportions plus the similar and congruent figures thing today. pretty easy, the latter. the first is mainly about putting a particular formulae into usage, and absorbing it into the brain juice of yours :O. Taadaaaaaaa.

Makes me feel pretty clever, LOL. Hahah. Anyway, I don't really have much else to say alr, so I guess I'll just post some pics :D. Note: read the words below the pictures. They refer to the above pictures, yeah. LOL. Sorry for confusing.

SPECIALLY FOR THE SPECIAL ONES THAT I LOVE :D.

SPECIALLY FOR HANGUANG! LOL ;D. my favourite and ONLY companion~ :D. see the last picture! I'm the girl and you're the dog kkkkkkk :D.

FOR JASLYNN OEI XIN YU, VALERIE GOH PEI YI, DARSHINI JAYARAJ AND REGINEEEEEEEE :D :D. I LOVE YOU Babes :D. @jaslynn: WE ALWAYS DO THE MAKING UP CODE NAMES FOR GUYS RIGHT :DDDDDDDDDD.

Hey dward, I even have a few for you :D. See, i'm still so nice to you.

if you can't see the last one, it's

when I first met you I never would have imagined that I would have such strong feelings for you. I never would have thought that I would have dreams about you or miss being by your side or getting butterflies in my stomach when someone mentions your name. when I first met you I never would've thought that I would love you. ♥

but now, it's over :D

no way, you're never gonna shake me.

2010-01-09T00:50:00.000-08:00

We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine
Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die, noooooo

You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Boy don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me

Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I ain't gonna cry no
And I won't beg you to stay
If you're determined to leave boy
I will not stand in your way
But inevitably you'll be back again
Cause ya know in your heart babe
Our love will never end no.

I LOVE YOU STILL K :D. Even if you're upset, you can insult me because it's alright with me. You can do this, I guess. I won't cry. I know you still care. Thanks so much. ((((((: you'll be back. Even you said it. Sigh. I'll miss you. But we'll still talk. You're such a fabulous friend, i don't know what to say.

Anyway, today was pretty fun. CCA extravaganza. Talked alot to Jianyi ;D. LOL. We were shuaige hunting, even though he was a guy. Okay, okay, LOL. He ain't gay, he likes Vera kkkkkkk :D. Then we even got into trouble with a teacher cuz we went to find the shuaige again -.- LOL. Anyway was quite fun, went for Drama and debate. Performed finish then went to help Debate. LOL. Debate and chess same room, saw hanguang. He said I sucked 7 times. Then I ignored him kkkk see I so pro. :D.

Read the debate script out for the juniors. Did the "110 OIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII" thing. They fail leh they don't even know what is that. they gave me the O.o look like I'm a mental retard or what. So fail then their councillor taught them how to reply -.-! Then I felt like a lameshit person. Then I saw that dude that I made friends with that said he'd come to drama. HE EPIC LAUGH AT ME LA WTF IDIOT SHORTY.

-actually for a sec 1, he's taller than me -.- -

HE'S LIKE EPIC TALL K SO NOT COUNTED I ANGRY I EMO I GO CRY I GO SCREAM. Okay anyway today I saw 3 shuaiges out of all the sec 1s -.-!!!!!!!! FAILLLLLLLLLLLLLLL. But got a lot of cute cute cute cute ones okay. One is from 102 -HEHEHEHEH AUDREY IS A STALKER.- He looks angmoh, even Jianyi was like, "AUDREY LOOK OVER THERE" :OOOOOO. He's got good taste manz. Then got one "phantom" one that Jianyi kept insisting was cute. Then we ran back to debate there to find him LOL. Then the teacher scold us. LOL she say we like spectators then the sec 1s like zoo animals like that HAHAHAHHAHA. THEN ME AND JIANYI WERE LIKE LAUGHING WHILE SHE SCOLDED US. then she shooed us; didn't look too angry (Y) :D

Aiya looking at shuaiges ain't a crime. Sorry. LOL. Then I went and did Drama again, then went back for debate. Talked some crap with Miss Kali. Then read the script again :O then it was time to go and that was when I saw Weehernnnnnnnnnn. Okay he looks cute but he's not my type ew okay :X. Anyway he's damn nice and sweet LOL. I GL him, he was NICE to me. LOL. LOL. It was like, he and the other chess club peoples supposed to pack the tables. Then I purposely got sit on the chair Weehern was gonna push. Then he was like, "sorry leh, can you get out of the seat, i need to rearrange." LOOOOOOOOOL? then after that he stacked up all the chairs then i purposely went to sit on the chairs. then he was like, "be careful kkkkk later you fall down D:" WOW SO NICE RIGHT.

Anyway after that went with Hazel to Canteen to slack. Saw hanguang BLAHHHHHHHHH. then he purplely went and look at the ceiling k. Then me and Hazel had lunch while waiting for my dad. then after that went to GO to wait. hanguang joined us. then we had a super UNfun time there in which we talked lots of cock about Drama. D: actually more about ALVIN LOL.?! Okay that is epic fail. Anyway I saboed hanguang for littering cuz I'm an evil person sorry D;.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :DDDDDDDDD.

Hahahh. I'mma gnna fall asleep soon, so blog more next times :D adeus fermosa,

so progress report: i am missing you to death.

2010-01-08T02:57:00.000-08:00

so progress report: i am missing you to death.

It's true. Sigh, though I probably don't deserve you. I'm sure you'll be happy (:. Jiayou. Anyway, today was epic fail. I am damn upset with myself kkkkk. I think I make everyone despair in me. Manz I sucks I is a lousy friend I is going to commit suicide T.T

SORRY SO MUCH. I'M REALLY SORRY. T.T

I despair in myself too. Very much.

Anyway, that was about C. Let's talk about S.

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MANNNNNNNN IT'S BEEN AGES BOY. I wanna talk to you so so so so badly.

You made me want you oh-so-bad it hurt.

Still does. But boy, in case you didn't know..........

I used to be lovedrunk, and now I'm not over.

I love you forever, forever is still here.

Yeah I hate it whenever I see you online T.T and the silence kills me. IT'S LIKE YOU FORGOT ABOUT ME, -heartbreaks-.

Whatever. I will get over you. One way or another.

It's like, what do you think of me? I'm just pushed aside in your super absolutely genius brain, right? Sigh. Whenever I can't sleep at night, I just let my mind wander, really. It's pretty aimless. It comes back to you and a couple of other guys, S. Sigh.

I'm tryna, I'm tryna holler at you. I want, to get, to know you better.

It's true.

Today was so screwed anyway. Sorry Hanguang T.T.

sorrysorrysorrysorry.

I'mma lousy friend.

AND YOU PANGSEHED ME STILL -.- though i guess it was only right of you to do such. Today's lessons were the same as ever. Dylan complaining for the next teacher's lessons, and everything else. AHHHHHHH I STILL OWE AUSTIN ONE JOTTER BOOK K.

THEN SOMEMORE TOMORROW GOT CCA EXTRAVAGANZA WHAT LAME SHIT MUST GO SCHOOL ON SATURDAY WTF?! Hated. I miss my sec 1 days where I saw the tall peoples advertising lamely for their cca. LOL. HAHAHHA I'M SO MEAN -.- sigh.

i need some juniors to talk to too. I can't stick with seniors and my age FOR THE WHOLE YEAR T.T. When the seniors grad, it's gone. then later scarcely my only friends left is the people in my batch. FAIL SIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA LA.

SO I MUST FIND JUNIORS. tomorrow i will ask random juniors for their handphone numbers kkkkk. then by the end of tomorrow i will have 440 new friends :DDDDDDDDDDDD. (11 classes, 40 students each). or maybe I can be biased then only ask for the cute/sexy/handsome guys. LOL. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. then I'll be a realbitch, not like the one I was accused wrongly of. YEAH AND DYLAN CALLED ME A BITCH TOO -.-

Hey, how long till the music drowns you out?
Don't put words up in my mouth,
I didn't steal your boyfriend,
Hey, how long till you face what's goin' on,
Cause you really got it wrong,
I didn't steal your boyfriend,

Well I'm sorry,
That he called me,
And that I answered the telephone,
Don't be worried,
I'm not with him,
And when I go out tonight,
I'm going home alone,
Just got back from my tour,
I'm a mess girl for sure,
All I want is some fun,
Guess that I'd better run,
Hollywood sucks you in,
But it won't spit me out.

Please stop telling all your friends,
I'm getting sick of them,
Always staring at me like I took him from ya'.

Fact is, I didn't.

gotta make you understand.....

2010-01-07T05:07:00.000-08:00

wow. my zihigh died.

don't wanna talk about it.

sigh.

i like him, really.

more than he knows for sure~

who cares anyway.

unreciprocated feelings are alright :D.

i have others. (:

like my friends,

like -ahem-edward-ahem-

like he-who-must-not-be-named-but-is-known-as-JFA....

omg i really wanna know more about JFA.

SO FREAKING FRAPPING BADLY.

he made me want him, oh-so-bad, it hurt.. but boy, in case you haven't heard.. i used to be lovedrunk, and now i'm hungover, i love you forever, forever is NOT over..

2010-01-06T23:37:00.000-08:00

HEADLINES BEFORE MY EPIC LONG POST:
EDWARD TAY WANG MING IS BACK IN SINGAPORE FOR GREEN DAY!!!!!!!!! WHOOOOOOO :D

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. i got things to say. finally. I was totally super uber duper extremely upset yesterday cuz I thought Mr Tan didn't like me T.T. Turns out that he's okay with me, alright. So I can like, stop emoing. Okay, let's talk about today. Todayyyyyyyyyyy is the greatest, day I've ever known~~~~~~~

Okay, thats like over-exaggerating. But it wasn't bad. Okay. Yeah. Went to school, talked cock. Was NOT looking forward to PE. AHAHAHAHHAHAHA. FAIL. AHAHAHAH. DON'T TALK ABOUT IT T.T

SEE I'M SO NICE I WAVED AT HANGUANG HE DON'T WAVE BACK. he was just like o.O if I'm not wrong. LOOOOOOOOOOL. okay yay, Audrey is now 159 cm :DDDDDDD. Don't talk about my weight. I'mma fatass. I go and cry ): ): ): . I LOST 1KG BUT I'M STILL A FATASS. FATFATFATFATFATFATFAT. emo sob. D:

Okay, then after that went back to class. Was chemistry. New cher :O. Mr Ng!!!!!!!!!!!!! He's so cute manz, hahaha :D. I bet we can become best friends (Y) (Y) (Y). Okay, then after that had recess. Super epic slimmed down so we decided to eat very little D:. Could have died with hunger, ugh. D: BUT IT'S WORTH IT ALRIGHT :D. Okay, then went back to class. Had math with Mrs Tan and Mdm Anu. YES I LIKE MATHS OKAY. IDK WHY YOU ALL DON'T LIKE T.T had super uber epic fun time talking cock with Austin and Dylan ;D. Super nice guys luhs, hahah. We're convinced that 209 is haunted, btws. :O I'm convinced kkkkkkkk! I saw the curtain open by itself T.T AND THE WINDOW WAS CLOSED.

So confirm got ghost. So scary. Nee ways after that was Chinese with Zheng Laoshi. During Mrs Tan's lessons, Dylan kept complaining about Zheng Laoshi xP. Hey, she's like really really nice alright! This year we will CONFIRM DO ALL CHINESE HOMEWORK. Audrey susan chua won't slack either. Wish me luck okay :DDDDDDDD. Anyway, then Dylan was okay with Zhenglaoshi cuz we spent most of the lesson talking Dx. Then at the last 10 minutes, Dylan kept complaining about Mr Tan. DOTS. Dylan got problems with teachers. But I honestly like Mr Tan alright! He's super uber nice-according to Hazel Liu. D: Jiayou.

I was super uber duper panicky when it was 12, because I was scared that I couldn't collect the Reader's Digest forms plussssss the English Introductory Essay. Then Mr Tan was like, "I like efficient english reps.".................... sigh. then I was like, pretty upset cuz idk, it could have been sarcasm or a compliment. More for the sarcasm side, I guess. So sorry luhs. I felt slightly sad. Then I went and collected the money. Then he said cannot pass up cuz not everyone passed up.Then I felt emo again. Like I was a failure that they didn't pass up T.T Sigh. Then I just went back to my seat like that. LOL then Dylan go xiang wai ask me what was on Mr Tan's computer screen. LOL HE THINK WHAT!? D: D: D; Then Mr Tan made us do essay, blahblahblah. did mine on money. the other topics were shit. Then i just started writing and writing. Till suddenly, Dylan and Austin were talking about stories. They made me lose my concentration. Then I reread my compo to get back in line with it. It was then which I realized I was doing an argumentative essay, WTF. then we're supposed to write a story. So i looked at the clock.

1pm. grazie. Had 20 minutes to finish a 250 word essay. Without epic failing. I can't have THAT on my conscience. Guess what? I took 10 minutes -.-. Did a partially story like, partially argumentative like thing. But hey, i think it looked good. Plus Dylan likes my argumentative essay, wheeeee :D. Hope it went alright :D. Then Mr Tan just threw all the collected essays at me and asked me to rearrange and put in his locker-.-! 好像我是工人那样!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay, Ugh. Forget it. Then siansiansian went to rearrange and put inside Mr Tan's locker, blahblahblah, it was super high up, couldn't reach much -.-!!!!! I asked some random senior dude to help me put LOL. Then went up for debate meeting, for the shirt. Apparently took ages talking cock. Was bored out of my wits T.T then whatever luhs, saw Vera, Grace and Alvin. Said hi to Vera and Grace. LOL. They're nice people (:. Then anyways, talked with Carissa for a good 30 minutes or so. Mainly crap. Then me and Jowell went down to find hanguang :DDDDDDDD.

SEE OMG HE'S SO NICE HE ACCOMPANIED ME K :D.

Okay, then he decided to alienate us. So he walked super fast T.T then we just talked cock behind luhs. Then we saw the nanhuaspeaks peoples again, but nehmind. Then we just walked out of school, talking about random crap. Sigh....... I know i'm an antisocial and everything T.T and I got no friends and anything T.T. Yeahyeah, then we just walked and talked then Jowell pangsehed me for her new boyfriend the 183 bus or whatever it was T.T Then walked with Hanguang all the way to Clementi MRT. SIANNNNNNNNNNNN. LOL. NAH JUST KIDDING. Quite funny actually o.o UNexpectedly, HAHAHAHAHAH :D. LOL, it was to be expected actually, he's a great friend after all :D.

Saw the ex-205ians there. Such as Baocai, Zhikai and Weiting :DDDDDDDDD. Zhikai. Jesus. I've not talked to him yet. AND HE'S WEARING LONG PANTS :OOOOOOOO. Eeeeeh....... Sigh...... Weiting I said hi too :DDDDDDD. Yay. Then spent the next 5 minutes pretending I didn't know Hanguang and he didn't know me. So epic funny, in an epic fail kinda way, hahahh :D

Said hi to a random sec 1 on the way. See I'm so "social", right o.o. LOL.

Me: Hello.

Girl: -looks around- ....hi.....?

Me: Are you sec 1?

Girl: Yeah.

Me: Oh okay. -was seriously tempted to say, didn't your mom teach you not to talk to strangers?-

Hey, but if you never talk to strangers, you'll NEVER make any friends in your life right. Plus, I'm not dangerous in any way, therefore don't be scared. LOL. Then after that was...

Me: What CCA are you planning to join?

Girl: Umm.. Not sure.

Me: Support english drama :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. -see so nice I advertized-

-no reply-

Me: -glance at hanguang- don't join chess. it sucks.

LOL OKAY RANDOM -.-

Today I realized I talk lots of crap. So shitty ugh T.T sorry T.T then anyway, at least I must end this thing. Said bye to Hanguang -hey I think I did T.T- then went home. the end. Messaged Hanguang. blahblahblah. and here I am, once again~

ADEUS FERMOSAS, THANKS FOR YOUR NEVER ENDING LOVE AND SUPPORT AT MY BLOG!

YOU KNOW YOU LOVE ME~

2010-01-05T01:16:00.000-08:00

he'd graduate and I wouldn't find a four-leaved clover~

Aww. I'mma feel quite sad about that, really. I DO NOT WANT THAT DAY TO COME. T.T

S[he] Be[lie]ve[d].

So cool right. LOL. Hahah. Okay, I think I'd better talk about school. YESSSSSSSS i think the seating arrangement is alright :D.

I'm sitting with Valerie behind me, Hazel on my left, Dylan in front of me, Austin on my right. Not bad. LOL. Okay Dylan's funny, right. We can talk lots of cock xD. Like during CEP today, LOL. Confucian Ethics are so boring xP. Halfway through Dylan nosebleed. Poor boy :( :( :( :( :( I feel so sad. K.

Then we got yearbook. AIYA DON'T TALK ABOUT IT THE CLASS PHOTO SO UNGLAM THE CCA ONES ALSO T.T LOL. so me and Jaslynn spent the time looking at the senior's classes :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. See if got any SHUAIGE LOLOLOLOLOL.

Sorry dudes, I see none. LOL.

nah just kidding.

GOT A HOLY EPIC LOT MANXZXZXZ :OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

especially last year's sec 3. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA. HAHHAHAHAHAHAH. SHHHHHHHHHH.

hey i didn't say anything.

nee ways the sec 2s were cute too omg(last year's one). MUST SHHHHHHHHHHHH.

i didn't say anything either. :D.

LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA:D.

Okay i go do homework baiz i lovez you!

i'm two quarters and a heart down.

2010-01-04T04:13:00.000-08:00

Sigh.

-63rd time already-

I'm sighing too much.

I realized that I hated myself today.

Sigh.

-64th-

I don't know what's wrong either.

Sigh

-65th-

School isn't the same as last time.

It's just, different.

In any way possible.

Sigh

-68th-

If sighing is considered a skill, I'd be the best in the world.

Sigh

-69th-

I can't help it.

I decided I hate school.

I DON'T WANNA GO TO SCHOOL FOREVER T.T

sob.wah.sob.wah. T.T T.T

T.T I WANNA CRY ALREADY BYE.

he turns and says, "are you alright?"

2010-01-03T02:47:00.000-08:00

He. Doesn't. Care.

I must be so fucking blind.

I don't even know why I feel like crying either.

Remember my New Year's resolution?

To not cry unless absolutely necessary?

Fuck, I just fucking broke it.

Shows how suckish 2010 will be.

I must be a really lousy friend.

I really detest myself sometimes.

I really think I cry too easily.

I suck.

I don't know why I have to be hurt so many times, though.

Suckish people like me should never feel like this.

It hurts too much to put it into words.

Oh well.

I guess it can't get much worse.

Tonight it's "It can't get much worse", versus "no one should ever feel like..."

No one should ever feel like me. Hurts too unbearably much.

I deserve it I guess.

parlez vous francais~

2009-12-31T07:38:00.000-08:00

A new year is like, beginning in 20 minutes or so.

2010.

Wonder what surprises this year holds in store. Dear god, please please please make it a better year. This year, my resolutions are...

BE MORE SOCIAL. don't antisocial. don't shy away. its okay to talk to random people.
STUDY HARD. the chers said I can do well, if I bother studying hard. This year, I will bother.
MAKE NEW FRIENDS. Reach 1k friends on facebook okay :D. LOL.
Will NOT cry. Unless absolutely necessary.
LOVE JUNIORS OKAY :D. must be friends with all sec 1s.
emcee something, LOL.
learn a new sport......?

I WILL ACHIEVE THIS. YES YES YES I WILL.

we'll keep stepping up, and we just won't stop~

2009-12-29T04:09:00.000-08:00

Helloooooooooooo :D.

Your blogmistress hasn't TOUCHED Inuyasha for 3 days! Omg, I'm missing no-lifing already. Anyway, today is 29th December 2009, Tuesday. School is starting on 4th January 2010, Monday. Crap, that leaves me 5 days to complete.....

2 book reviews.
2 history learning logs.
MANY MANY CHAPTERS OF MATH.
INUYASHA. Walao.

Okay, thats like, so freaking much. And the 4th is a pleasure, HAHAHAH. Okay, today i will read Inuyasha till 4am :DDDDDDDD. Anyway, I have epic shingz lots to say, about yesterday and today. Okay, yesterday is quite short, i can summarize in bullet points. :/.

YESTERDAYYYYYYYYYY:D

Christalle convinced my mom to let me go kbox with her and regine.
Pangsehed Christalle + Regine for a bit to go find Leonard at Yew Tee MRT. Get his super coolshingz christmas presentyes thats Leonard's present. SUPER CUTE LA I WANT TO SCREAM. :D. Inside got one super pretty heartshaped keychain.
Yeah, Christalle complaining, rushed back to join them at KBOX. FOB SONGS, JESSE M SONGS; LOVEDDDDDDD.
Walked around, ate cheap food .
Camwhored.
Jumpshot LOL. EPIC FAILLLLLLLLLLLLL.
THE END :DDDDD.

TODAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY :DDDDDDDDDDDD

K I lazy make bullet form. So let's talk about the whole thing. I love to go into detail :D. Originally we were gonna watch

(HEY CHECK IT OUT JESSE MCCARTNEY♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥)

then it was too epic crowded till the last four seats together was like right in front, epic WTF?????????????? no i don't want to epic crane my neck, thank you very much honey. So instead we went to watch

COOOOOOOOOL SEE SHERLOCK LOOKS HORRIBLE. Okay, besides that, the movie damn cool. Sherlock is damn epic clever he can think ahead of what he wants to do :OO. He was like, at the wrestling scene; thinking of what he can do. Then he did the punching, ball-kicking thing and that guy broke 3 ribs or something. LOL. He's damn epic coolshingz.

Okay, I realized I missed the beginning. Met Regine at 11.45 at the bus stop. 15 minutes late. Then i was like HOLY SHIT CONFIRM LATE WALAO DIE. then i saw a taxi, immediately go and flag it without thinking. LOL. Regine and me took taxi to go bukit batok mrt station to meet hanguang. OKAY THIS PART AWKWARD BORING SHIT I DON'T WANT TO SAY I SKIP OKAY OKAY OKAY :DDDDDDD.

LOL. Reached before poop though I expected her to be wayyyyyyyyyy earlier! LOL. Who ask her wake up so late and sms me so late. Anyway, super uber duper epic shingz long queue. Tried to call my mom to book, she didn't answer. KK. Anyway, we got to the end, saw it was epic crowded then okay blablabla. mentioned above already. Then we went to eat food. Hanguang wanted to save money so he said go coffee shop. At some super epic far place. :OOOOOOOOOOOOOO. The food is all chickenny grossness. Poor chicken. And yes, i feel bad for wasting it too. But it's against my rights to eat MEAT! JEEEEEEZ. Like, i had to give Leonard the fish in my fillet -.- LOL k random. Who cares. Anyway.

Walked super epic far, saw the shop i bought my PSP from :O. Okay anyway, had super "awkward" time again during lunch, 没有人说话. THEN I SAW JOEL OMG LIKE BOOMZ. HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH. He sat like quite far away from us, then he looked at me. Then I was like O.O then he looked away. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA SO FUNNY.

So we zaoed back to AMK HUB. Bought food from NTUC. Brought into cinema. Made it just on time, due to my fabulous impromptu planning :D. Kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk got bullied to sit with Hanguang, but its not that bad i guess. LOL. Its quite funny actually ._. especially the Carlsberg advertisement. Apparently I'm the gorilla and he's the sexy lady o.o LOL. HAHAH. so if i ever see this advertisement again, I confirm will start laughing LOLOLOLOL. kk then watched movie. kk then valerie pangseh. kk then we took MRT to Bukit Batok.

I WAS EXPECTING ANOTHER SUPER AWKWARD SCENE. HAHAH. AT LEAST IT WAS BETTER NOW :D. Kinda, I guess. At least they were talking. Yay so I is become a happy kidz. Valerie+Regine+Hanguang = thanks for the presents + CARDS btw. BEAUTIFUL STUFF MEH. Anyway, went to westmall. Played stuff. Arcade. realized I sucked at Hockey and basketball. LOL. DON'T TALK ABOUT IT T.T Then. 走走。Regine emoing. Wanted to find concealer cannot. Then we walked to the back door. Saw Hanguang's block apparently. KKKKK can stalk him 8D. Then we went to MRT. Hooray. Then we took bus home. HOORAY. I too uber sleepy and tired to talk to regine. Regine emoing. But in the end, we still talked. K this part is blabbering I realized. Whatever. Went home, opened gifts. Super uber lovely meh, Hanguang's gift.

THANKS SO MUCH, HANGUANG, IF YOU'RE READING THIS.

2009-12-27T07:16:00.000-08:00

well, i'm sorry;
that he called me.
and that i answered the telephone.
don't you worry;
i'm not with him.
and when i go out tonight;
i'm going home alone.

welcome to the new administration.

2009-12-26T03:14:00.000-08:00

Holy jesus. I'mma looking at his facebook. And i remember suddenly, the times before that we talked as though there was no tomorrow. Somehow, how did we fall apart........? It's really... Disheartening. And I'm not ashamed to say I might miss him either. Everytime in school if we pass by each other, we just smile. :/. Admittedly, I haven't talked to him in real life before, and Elaine's been urging me like siao, but I'm admittedly really really, shy. :X :X :X.

Oh Jesus Christ, I miss you.

i've never had someone, as good for me as you.

2009-12-25T05:06:00.000-08:00

Omg. I was epic sad just now, and really, honestly, I don't understand why either. My feelings are simply really really ineffable. But then, guess what ._. 29 people comforted me just now, when i simply said i was fucked up sad. Honestly. Omg, I really really feel loved. I will dry my tears, I will. I promise. Yeah, I was having Christmas dinner just now. Then I felt the inexplainable urge to start bawling my eyeballs out. I felt so so so inexplicably upset, I don't understand..

Yeah, I went to the toilet to actually cry. When I came out, my eyes were bloodshot. Holy crap. I didn't look at anyone for ages, just kept looking at my food. I felt idiotic just now. Maybe I am. Sigh. Anyway, I guess my friends love me for being idiotic, hahah. Today was damn epic sian ._. went to watch Avatar with my father @ Filmgarde; Illuma. Epic, the sound system was just boomz. The movie was good, I guess. Touching. Kinda.

I'M GOING TO GO NO LIFE AGAIN. HAHAH. BYE LOVELIES. :X.

you were the last good thing, about this part of town.

2009-12-24T18:00:00.001-08:00

LOL. I was looking at my last blog post. I posted it using that google picture editor thing ._. that's why there's the little symbol thingy at the bottom. Anyway!

HOORAY IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D

I really really want to thank all my beloved friends/relatives/acquaintances for wishing me Merry Christmas today at 12 AM :D. Yes yes yes, in total, I got a 183 smses from different people wishing Merry Christmas! Hoorayyyyyyyy :D. I love you guys too! And if you haven't wished me Merry Christmas, hahah, it's not too late yet :D. I'm really really happy cuz today was the day that I really felt loved by many peoples :D. I'm not aloneeeeeeeeee~ I have my friends. And hopefully, my acquaintances will get to know me better :D.

Anyway, I really want to thank you guys FOR EVERYTHING. For putting up with my lame-crap, for putting up with my super blasphemous shit when I'm like; Punch-drunk, for letting me confide in you, for letting me do many many many things with you guys. You guys are like, super uber fantastic people, in your very own way.

Thanks so muche :D. Yes, okay, let's talk about yesterday. Yesterday was the day I did a gay performance ._. . No, i didn't screw it up, but I can't do hammer ons well enough, yet. T.T The beginning of "Why Don't You Kiss Her" goes like..

E|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
 B|--0-1-33--------0-1-33--------------0-1-3--3-5-7-8--7h87-3-5----------|
 G|---------00--------------0-0h20---------------------------------------|
 D|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
 A|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
 E|----------------------------------------------------------------------|

However, mine was like;

E|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
 B|--0-1-33--------0-1-33--------------0-1-3--3-5-7-8--7-87-3-5----------|
 G|---------00--------------0-0-20---------------------------------------|
 D|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
 A|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
 E|----------------------------------------------------------------------|
My hammer ons; instead of being one note, became 2. Holy shingz.

:D

2009-12-23T20:49:00.000-08:00

HI I'M HAPPY AGAIN.
shuai ge ^^

the little things...

2009-12-23T05:08:00.000-08:00

I promised I wouldn't cry.

I'm sorry, I broke that promise.

Messenger Plus! Chat Log

Session Start: Saturday, December 05, 2009
(5:02 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: HELLO DARLING OMG.
(5:02 AM) Edwardtayisbastard<3:>
*erm
*how r u
(5:03 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: lol.
*don't ask la ._.
*can you guess what happened.
*you were right.
(5:04 AM) Edwardtayisbastard<3:>
*if it was up 2 me, he'd cry tonight.
*bastard
*heck care la yo.
*dnt emo
*-.-
*wat do u expect from some1 liek him
*huh?
(5:05 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: maybe its like my fault.
* i mean like, if i was nicer, if i was more perfect, if i was everything good ._.
* like, not lousy old me.
(5:05 AM) Edwardtayisbastard<3:>
*u aren't lousy -.-
*he's juz gay la.
*wat kind of faggot
*forces people to do things they dw to do -.-
*trust me, as long as u noe u did ur best
*then im sure u did.
*heck care what he wants -.-
*if he's so gd, he could have did it himself
*bstrd.
(5:06 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: don't call him bastard la. .
*he's nice.
*nowadays.
*i guess. . .
(5:06 AM) Edwardtayisbastard<3:>
*seems 2 me liek he's making use of you deyz
*dnt care him larh =D
*cheer up, i'll tell u something.
(5:06 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: what?
(5:07 AM) Edwardtayisbastard<3:>
*audrey
*audrey
*audrey
*audrey
*audrey
(5:07 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: WHAT LA ?!!!!?!?!?!!?!?!!??!?!
(5:08 AM) Edwardtayisbastard<3:>
*am
*coming
*back
*to
*singapore =D.
(5:09 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: LOL.
*WOW edward, i didn't know that.
*who was that PERSON who promised me that green day concert? ._.
(5:09 AM) Edwardtayisbastard<3:>
*no
*i mean like
*come back
*as in PERMANENTLY =D
(5:09 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{its: WTF?!?!?!?!!?!?
*OMG
*OMGOMG
*JIVOAELBV
*AEB
*EABJEABKA
*VA
*OJMVOALEVA
*EVKEAPOB KVAE
*OMGWTFBBQSAUCES
*HOORAY :D :D :D :D :D

Clap until your hands hurt; standing ovations, or boos?

2009-12-23T00:01:00.000-08:00

Hello dear readers :D. Your blogmistress has joined the ranks of the no-lifers. I am currently a farking manga addict/jerk/geek. Therefore you must not expect much of my blog anymore. T.T I'm so sorry guys. HAHAH. Who asked Terrence to buy me that comic ._. ANYWAY LOL. I remember watching Inuyasha when I was like, 6 years old with my mom. And then I'm like a fucking addict now again. I'mma like, so outdated. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. BUT THE GUYS IN THE MANGA IS SERIOUSLY DAMN HOTCRAP, UGH.

Pictures speak a thousand, million words.

HAHAHAHAHAHHA. I'M ADDICTED WTFUX. Omg so hot right 8D. All of the above. :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D.

Sorry I'm reduced to being such a damn epic no life loser. I hope that I will overcome my addiction soon. Meanwhile, I will go and no-life again. :D. -This is good cuz I don't feel any pain, hahah.-

and my homework is UNcomplete. Fuck.

i only want what i can't have.

2009-12-22T07:01:00.000-08:00

i promised you that this won't happen.

look, golly, it totally just happened.

and honey, I really don't know what to say either.

I lead a cocked-up life.

shorty,what do i do to get you home?

2009-12-20T18:31:00.000-08:00

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. MAJOR OMG. YESTERDAY'S TUITION WAS MORE FUN THAN I EVER EXPECTED IT TO BE! :O. Hahah, Mr Gan is so damn cute man! Hahaha. We talked lots of cock and laughed too much. Ohmy, I wish I was there last week too. Cuz Gan was saying that last week was damn quiet, hahah. I bet I could have changed that. Well, I think Joel changed that, LOL. Joel didn't go yesterday though, so I harbor a guess that he's overseas. And Shisien and Daryl didn't either. But I will confirm see all 3 of them on the next lesson :X.

LOL. there was some 110 guy from nanhua there. But I never saw him in my life. LOL. And he's like, neighbours? But I guess he's quite nice luhs. Saw Jingyuan and Zonghan there. BLAH. But they're nice people, nonetheless. Jingyuan is AN EPIC RICH KID. hwachonginternational seh. :X. 20k a year seh. LOL. Zonghan officially became the purple zebra! :D. Cuz of his lame shirt. Okay, anyway, we talked cock, and Mr Gan said I can go to an IP school, and YES I WOULD LIKE TO GO TO HWACHONGINSTITUITION PLEASE. Just wait for me to get a sex change.

I just wanna live, don't really care about the things that they say, don't really care about what happens to me!

Anyway, laughed too much already. Luckily Serena was there :X. I'd be the only girl, if not. LOL. I'm damn antisocial luhs. And urgh, Zonghan must have blabbed on me ._. Mr Gan was asking me how me and Zonghan communicated. LOL. UGH. Zonghan cheater! D:<

Whatever la, LOL. Not like we even talk damn often. It's like, if I'm lucky then talk luh. Same goes for a couple of others, especially one in particular, whom I'd very much like to talk to again. . .

I can't believe I used to like him! What was I thinking?!

Fantastic Facebook group. Anyway, it's wrong, it should be...

I can't believe I still like him! What AM I thinking?

I'mma thinking that he's damn epic cute. LOL. :/ Sigh. And the fact that the last time I talked to him was more than 2 weeks ago. :(

Anyway, back to whatchamacallit. THE GUYS ARE SO FUNNY. OMG. AND SO CUTE/LOVABLE/SWEET(?) Now if 109(now known as 209) guys can be like that :(. I WANT TO TRANSFER!. Okay, I know I'm coming off as childish. Ugh.

Omg hoorays Jaslynn's back! :). At least I have another friend now. LOL. -.- I'm just so freaking random today, I really don't know what to say. Anyway, back to tuition thingys. I didn't want tuition to end! HAHHAHA ;X. There was this ACS guy too, who was NOTHING like Daryl. Which is a good thing. He's like damn anti ._. Nevermind, hahah. anyway, day before, christalle's christmas party. I was expecting extreme boredom. But we played DAMNLOT OF FUN CARD GAMES WITH HER COUSINS 8D.

I especially liked the one where you had to shout out the person's nickname. HAHAHA. I couldn't think of any, so I totally just chose "G-Dragon". Cuz the number of korean bands things was just so much T.T hahah. There was...

DBSK. (LOL.)
SuperJunior!
Supercalifraglisticexpidialocious
Breaking Benjamin
G-Dragon LOL.

LOL. it was damn fun la. G-Dragon + Breaking Benjamin = Breaking Dragon. LOL. HAHAHAH. then when people shout my name, keep on shouting dragondragondragon. LOL. laughed too much. HAHAHHAHA. It was DAMN FUN LAAAAAAAA. :D.

Forget what we're told, before we get too old, show me a garden; full of life, bursting into life.

did he know that he was the only one, i noticed?

2009-12-18T17:59:00.000-08:00

EDWARD I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU. LOL.

But I will, and I must. I must be independant. And I can. Because, technically, we can totally still go skype :). So technically, I'm cheating, cuz I'm not living without you, but yeah, you get the cliche!

MIAN'S HOUSE IS FABULOUS. ABSOLUTELY EXTRAORDINARY. -extreme jealousy- its been ages since I felt jealousy, LOL. But yeah, it'sa okay :D. I'm alright, yes dears. and I'm filled to the brim with euphoria! I'm epic high, for no reason whatsoever. Heyheyhey, my house ain't that bad, alright? :/. Anyway, we watched 3 movies yesterday. All of them at least rated NC-16. :X

Jennifer's Body(NC-16)
Zombieland(M-18)
Inglourious Basterds{yeah they spelt it like that} (R)

COOL RIGHT. I didn't see any movie rated R before.(Rated R for strong graphic violence, language and brief sexuality.)

BRAD PITT IS A BASTERD?!

YES. Damn epic gory T.T They did scalping! OMG ITS SO DAMN EPIC BLOODY URKHGA I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. And there's lots of hot actors, too! HAHAHA. Jennifer's body was alright, lousy storyline, but Jennifer is HAWT. OMG LIKE HAWT.

SO HOT! HAHAHAHAHHAHA. She's damn epic cools :D. And of course, Zombieland..

the girl second from the right is damn pretty! hahah. the girl in the extreme right is from my sister's keeper :D. and i think the guy second from the left looks like Josh Groban. must be the hair :/. And the guy in the extreme left is extremely PRO. he killed off like 2784397618379812749713478913467167351247178975038179187263872418934903825287 zombies by himself :O PROSHITASS. his aiming is damn epic pro. i can't shoot T.T

Now let us not bring up the past issues. I know my Halo sucks. LOL. Anyway, i managed to laugh all my sadness away yesterday. sigh. and now, suddenly, for a reason, it's back. The extremely crushing senseless feelings. Look, I don't want to talk about it already.

"Every night I cry myself to sleep, thinking, "why does this happen to me? why does every moment have to be so, hard?"

cuz it was everything. it was simply just, everything..

2009-12-17T02:58:00.000-08:00

I can't stop putting Edward by Shannon Thomas on a loop. Cuz everything is just true.

Now he's gone, I'll never see him, and I'll never say, what I need to say.

I wanted to say those 3 overated, unacceptable words, but it's just wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Then when he left, which in fact was just an hour ago, I cried in public. What the hell. Thats just so not Audrey to do such. And there's more to it. More to this, then it seems. I fucking left Edward Tay hanging. And when Edward reaches Australia, he's going to go boomz when he reads this. I'mma so so sorry. So very sorry.

And anyway, to reply to your tag, I can't wait for Green Day either! OMG, will you come back tanned, muscular and sexy? Hahah. And I can't stand the thought of you without braces. Eurgh. Okay, anyway darlings. I don't feel like posting. I'm just going to waste my time in emo songs. And songs that I can relate too. Any recommendations just post in the cbox please :)

Thanks.

Edward - Shannon Thomas
Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol
Fall For You - Secondhand Serenade
Never Gonna Give You Up - Rick Astley
The Unforgiven - Metallica
My Apocalypse - Metallica
Heartbreaker - Pat Benatar
Cry - Rihanna
Cry Me Out - Pixie Lott
Suddenly - Ryan Ferguson
Because You Live - Jesse McCartney
Just So You Know - Jesse McCartney
When You Wish Upon A Star - Jesse McCartney
Screw it; anything by Jesse McCartney(L)
From Now On We Are Enemies - Fall Out Boy
Here Without You - 3 Doors Down
Kryptonite - 3 Days Grace
Monsoon - Tokio Hotel
White Horse - Taylor Swift
Broken Hearts Parade - Good Charlotte
Dance Floor Anthem - Good Charlotte
The Motivation Proclamation - Good Charlotte
Where Would We Be Now - Good Charlotte
You Found Me - The Fray
Never Say Never(Don't Let Me Go) - The Fray
How To Save A Life - The Fray
Tongue Tied - Faber Drive
When I'm With You - Faber Drive
What A Catch, Donnie - Fall Out Boy
America's Suitehearts - Fall Out Boy

Thanks for the recommendations, guys.

public display of affection~

2009-12-15T23:23:00.000-08:00

Ugh. My throat is inflammed, like there's no tomorrow. I can't even BREATHE IN WITH MY MOUTH, without feeling my throat aching. Holy crap, it hurts. And my voice sounds wrong, it sounds like my voice is breaking, honestly. The last time I felt like this was during National Day, we were screaming -.- EDC practice, bejeezus. Hahah, I didn't achieve anything today, and its 3.30 already. I MUST STUDY/DO HOMEWORK NOW!. Must, must must. But after this blog post, holy yeah. :D

I am NOT looking forward to going back to school. What crap is it that people say that during holidays, they wanna go back to school? Thats utter shit. I'm living the holidays, and I'm enjoying it, okay. The only part I'm not enjoying is the homework, and Edward leaving. Z, of all times, it had to be now, when we're like, bestest of the bestest of the bestest of friends. Honestly, he can't just leave now, cuz he'll forever be remembered by me. :/ and the many other friends he has. I'm just, blessed to have met someone like him. Helloooo, not many people'd...

Spam you when you don't reply out of hurt.
Call you when he knows you're sad, or when he's sad.
Absolutely honest.
Break bullies's fingers(LOL)
Laugh when being bullied.
Talk to pathetic ol' me T.T
Picks up your call at 2am in the morning; with a lot of anger. LOL.
Read your body language to understand your thoughts.
Talk cock when he knows you're close to tears.
Talk about THINGS.
Learn a sport with you
Help you up when you fall down without laughing
Fuck up the guy that just fucked you up.
IM you the second you get online.
Ponders the world with me.
Actually cries, because he is hurt. And he isn't afraid, to show it to me.
When you hurt him, he doesn't have to act like he doesn't care, because he does.
WEAR HOT PINK BRACES FOR A GUY, OMG .
TALK ABOUT GUYS . Omg, a guy talking about guys.
Favourite colour : HOT PINK (Y)
Retaliate when being pushed out.
Interrupt your conversation BITCHILY. LOL. I LIKE!

I never seen anyone just like Edward Tay Wang Ming~. Omg. Hahah. I just googled his chinese name, see this. LOL. Some kind of political leader or something? What a fantastic chinese name, for a fantabulous chinese guy, who is absolutely not interested in politics. LOL. He'sa.. Just my kind of guy (: I like guys that like things, without fearing what the effect may be. He likes hot pink, and he USES hot pink, people think he's gay, but he isn't :). He's just, too good for them, hahaha.

Anyway, I'mma sending him off tomorrow at Changi. I hope the plane just gets postponed, or the pilot gets sick so that he'll leave later. I don't want him to go now. Tomorrow is too soon. Too fast to live, too young to go.

oh he, oh he's so international.

2009-12-14T17:16:00.000-08:00

Hahahahahahahah, omg, I'm surprisingly happy after my screw up yesterday. I was so fucking upset, I didn't know what to say. Honestly, yesterday was the 3rd time I cried myself to sleep this year. And I don't know why either. Its so fucked up. Fucking fucking fucked up. And I'm so so so, sorry. I don't know how to say it either. I'm just such a waste. Sometimes maybe, I don't think I deserve to exist in this world. I'm just, to put it simply, not good enough.

I don't want my friends to leave me. I'm too selfish to let that happen. However, it's happening already. Goodbye Edward. I will, always miss you. You're my bestest of best friends, if you didn't know that. No one else can be like you. But, well, maybe it's possible that someone will be like you. I just have to wait and see, don't I? Anyway, I came back from Malaysia yesterday. I'm pretty upset, peoples. Honestly, I was gone for 4 stinking days, and I only got 73 text messages?! Helloooooooooooooooo. Overall winner's Edward Tay~. hahah, i think i forgot to tell him I was at malaysia :X he was spamming like siao, like "wtf reply la dey." "wtf r u daoing me!?!" "hellooooo"

LOL. IT WAS EPIC AMUSING.

Anyway, holy epic mama shit. I came back and went to messenger, and talked to ZONGHAN! hahah. he told me about tuition :X. Time to post msn history~

(3:24 AM) Zong Han: lols u got project ar (3:24 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: LOL.
nah
support my friend.
btw
how was tuition!
hahah.

(3:24 AM) Zong Han: k lar
all boys!!!!!!

(3:24 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: HUH
WTF
who is there
joel?

(3:25 AM) Zong Han: ya (3:25 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: who else
D:

(3:26 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: i know jim is in thursday class, hahah.

(3:26 AM) Zong Han: daryl jing yuan (3:26 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: ZZZ -.-

them again

(3:26 AM) Zong Han: the rest i dun know one (3:26 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: huh
how many guys

(3:26 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: what
then
no girls?

(3:27 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: K
I GO TIAO LOU
what time one uh
3 or 4/

(3:27 AM) Zong Han: 2 (3:27 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: 2?
LOL

(3:27 AM) Zong Han: ya (3:27 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: must be wrong class.

(3:28 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: its mr gan's class? (3:28 AM)

Zong Han: ya (3:28 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: LOL

SHIT
SHIT (3:28 AM)

Zong Han: my mother say mr gan change me to 2-4 (3:28 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: i thought got girls also
huh
walao (3:29 AM)
brb uhs
i call gangan (3:29 AM)

Zong Han: k
sian so few i know (3:30 AM)

Zong Han: T_T (3:31 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: sian simi sian

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: HAHAHAHAH SHIT (3:31 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: i'm in 2 o clock class tooz

and the guys
is make up lesson one
hahah
according togan (3:32 AM)

Zong Han: not all le
oni two wat (3:32 AM)

♥Audrey;;:;{cuz: huh
thats bad.

LOL. yeah, the conversation ended there. apparently, i make conversation hard for people, therefore yeah. :X Suckish right. Omgz, Daryl and Jingyuan AGAIN. and Joel too. Noooooooooo, this is just so epic goddamned wrong. its all wrong!!!!!!!!!! D: D: D: its like the clashing of 2 enemies together. I confirm epic die. At least Zonghan's nice :/. hahahah. I hope the other guys are nice too. Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. :( :( :( Anyway, Mr Gan got to be crazy if he is putting me and Joel in the same class. Unless he wants me to be nice and give in to Joel's epic retardedness. NO. I WILL NOT STAND DOWN >:D. Too bad, Joel.

Hahah, I guess Daryl and Jingyuan isn't THAT BAD, really........ They're from prestigious schools :/. *jealous* ACS and HCIS respectively. Yeah, international. Hwachonginternational...

Am I crazy, for loving him? Maybe do you think, he could love me too?

I think he hates me D: D: D:. We aren't like close or anything, either. I wish, I wish every single fucking day, that I could get to know him better. Omg, yeah, when I heard Jesse's Body Language, I immediately started thinking...... Taiwan's Judicial Yuan! LOL. LOL. LOL. Seriously. Taiwan's Judicial Yuan is like so fabulous, and so is the song. Thats why :X.

(Okay, that was like, so fake. If you want to know the real reason, ask me somewhere else.) I will just quote them here's.

"Oh he, oh he's so international"
"I'm trying, I'm tryna holler at you, I wanna get to know you better."
"Shorty, let me whisper in your ear. Tell you, everything you wanna hear. You got my vote: Hottest guy of the year, let's have a celebration, baby~"
"You're the hottest guy in the world, today.."

Omg, its so obvious. Is that enough hints yet. Will blog soon, adeus~

ineffability ; i don't quite know, how to say, how i feel.

2009-12-05T23:25:00.000-08:00

Finally I have time to blog again. Admittedly, I have plenty of time on my hands, and I'm slacking too much for my liking. However, I will continue my homeworks again soon :I so this post won't be long. I really find my life ineffable now. I can't explain myself anymore. Many have hurt me, I have hurt even more. And that really sucks. This is just so damn screwed, ugh. But at least, no matter how much I did, I got to know many people better over this holiday. Really. I know Darshini and Charmian and Jasmine now, in such a way that I never bothered to in Marymount. But it's a great thing, I'm really happy about it :D.

I'mma talking more to Joel & Sean too. That makes me even prouder of myself. I was never good at talking to guys :/. Edward helped me get over that fact, and he makes me happy too. So very undilutedly happy. Whenever I see him, it's like the sunshine mulling over all the remnants of the night; it's like bright, fantastic neon colours are bursting into life and overcoming all the emo blackness of my wardrobe. I once didn't know how to phrase this particular feeling of mine. Now I know how to, thanks to Edward Tay, and Snow Patrol (((:

"those 3 words, are said too much. but they're not enough."

yeah, you know the words :D. But it's not enough, ever, to express my gratitude for Edward. Without him, I don't know where I'd be today. He really really really really really understands me. Edward is my definition of a real best friend, in the harsh cruelty of this world.

He always stands up for me.
He doesn't insult me. (Teasing is officially not counted, so don't go blah, tay >:D)
He is honest, in ever situation possible.
He loves me, as a friend. He said it so many times :)
He makes me happy
He spams me, he calls me, he always answers the phone, he doesn't hang up on me.
He doesn't use me.
He understands me.

This is too much for me already. Thank you Edward.

cuz he'll never know; if i never show, the way I feel inside...

2009-12-03T02:02:00.000-08:00

Edward Tay; I is love you very muchzezxezxwxzx.

He actually wanted to buy GTA: Chinatown Wars for my christmas present(!) But i decided to save his money and download from pspiso. Yes, I'm a cheapskate. Anyway, wooooo, Cady and Jasmine's coming over tomorrow~ Hahah, I admittedly can't wait :D. Sunday = Going out with mayning too. Bowling. LOL. I want mian to go. Then we can laugh like shit again. Hahahahahah.

Sorry for such a short post, I've got to go now. Yes darlings, something happened yesterday. Admittedly, I may still be sad, but its not that bad already. I really get up of sadness pretty quickly. :D

I need your grace, to remind me, to find my own..

2009-12-02T01:15:00.000-08:00

Homework's gonna murder me.

-Todo list-

1. Finish halfway done SHUIBI >.< [✔]

2. finish learning log chapter 1. [ ]

3 Finish learning log chapter 2 toooo. >.< [ ]

4. shinglee, math. [ ]

5. Arrange outings [✔]

6. Revise chinese tingxie(tuition and school.) [ ]

7. Read through my sec 2 stuffs. [ ]

8. Another shuibi. [✔]

9. Finish "First You Run" [✔]

10. Finish "Midnight Sun" [✔]

11. Charge iPod [✔]

12. x4 Chinese Book Reviews [ ]

As you can clearly see, I lead a hectic life. Hahah, but I'm pretty proud of myself, admittedly. I can juggle this, plus 2 CCAs, plus fencing and ice-skating. Addition of guitar lessons. (: Okay, fine, so my grades aren't something to boast about(apart from math & english~) But, well, yeah. I'm still happy. Today, I achieved finishing "First You Run" and "Midnight Sun". Holy omgz, Midnight Sun was fabulous. I never knew that Edward's mind works so ... Technically? And gosh, he actually thought Bella as NOTHING in the beginning, he thought of her as another human. Jesus, if there was someone like him in this world, he'll just think of me as HUMAN. Unless my mind is as complex and backwards as Bella's is, such that he'll choose me to stand out from amongst all the other peoples.

what is there not to love about the above? :O. I can totally list you a 101 reasons why he's way better than Taylor Lautner. (Especially since Edward's vegetarian~) Okay, whatever. He makes my heart want to jump out of my ribcage and tap dance, jeez. Stupid Taylor Lautner fanatics, they don't know how sensible, how sensitive, and how downright sexy Robert Pattinson is. Anyway, enough about him. Let me talk about today. I achieved nothing I'm proud of today; if Fencing's excluded. I think I might have jabbed Terrence in the balls by accident. SORRY :X. Hahah, but his FACE was EPIC PRICELESS, okay! He did some horrible grimacey thing, like >.<. But more intense!

Okay, whatever, fencing in the morning,(I was late, woke up at 8.30 wtf!) followed by coming home to finish Midnight Sun. I finished Cady's First You Run on the taxi ride there. hahah, omg, Adrien Fletcher sounds so hot :O. And Miranda Lang sounds too nerdy for Adrien, uhhhh. Oh well, I guess they have their own preferences~. So I came home, and started finishing up Midnight Sun, which is so enjoyable! Ugh ;D. Edward's jealousy drives me happy, hahahahahhaha. I swear, he's like totally jealous whenever Mike Newton goes anywhere near to Bella. And honestly, Edward doesn't even DARE to stroke Bella's cheek, holy shit. I'd be dying of ecstasm if he ever stroked my cheek! *squeals!*

Update soon, I prolly should do my homework.

If I lie here, would you lie with me, and just forget the world?

2009-11-30T03:19:00.000-08:00

Today I'm in an epic sad mood, for reasons unbeknown to the world. To this evil, meat-eating world, but the vegetarian topic is out. Sometimes it just feels to me like no one cares, and then again, maybe its true that no one cares. But then, although some people may really hate me, I look at my friends, I look at my parents, and I think, is that possible? no, I didn't think so. But when I'm all alone, without anyone IMing/SMSing/Calling me, I feel a horrible sense of loneliness. Sometimes, when I talk to people, I can even feel fake. Horribly, terribly fake. Like, it's not me, really. I just don't seem to be the person, that everyone once knew. It's a horrible terrible feeling, and when you're alone, its even worse. The darkness simply just takes you along for the ride, screws you up, and throws you out into nothingness.

Is it just fair, that people out there are somehow, so fake, yet they can be happy? They can somehow, master that happy facade such that its like they're lying to themselves, but they aren't? Contradictions. I know. Is it possible, for me to lie to myself too? But this fakeness, this facade is deafeningly horrible, and detrimental to my sanity. I decided not to lie anymore, its time to be, just me. I hope that I won't be sad anymore, for this matter. In fact, I'm going to do something that will be good, for me. AKA, my homework. Let me go onto a happier note, yes?

The homeworks that I'm left with :

x4 chinese book reviews. shit.
x1 shuibi. time to tackle this later.
history learning log chapter 1 and 2. maybe later(?)
maths assesment book, chapters 4,5,6,8,9,10,11,13,14.

that doesn't look like much, but the book reviews are gonna be helluva of a Christmas present, grazie, grazie. :I Honestly, chinese is not my thing. But, I think, I might actually try to believe in myself and put in more effort for chinese. Although I know that its actually impossible for me to like the subject, or language, for the matter. But, I do have to improve, if I want to get anywhere in the future. I must stop this slackdom, I must stop this going-out thing. I go out too often, for anyone(apart from me) to like. Jesus. My mom and dad are fretting, and I'm panicking inside too. I'm not working hard enough, I'm not the one that they once were proud of anymore.

Apart from that, I guess I might need to go into detail for the previous days. My last post is totally outdated and overated, Charmian's and My outing with the St. A's dudes. LOL. I really, really, have to update. But I can't remember too far back, so here's the few things I've got.

-Friday-

Went out with Darshini and Mayning to J8 to watch a movie/have lunch/take neoprints/walk about. I guess it was fun, Darshini's first real major outing! :) I'm happy for her, hahah. And I think she's real nice too :D. Anyway, hahah, Jesus, it was fun, the movie(A Christmas Carol) was great, I guess..

-Saturday-

Shitty tuition. After tuition, went to watch NEWMOON. OMG, this is when I epic started heavily crushing on Robert Pattinson. Admittedly, he doesn't look good, but, WTH? I think he's damnn epic SEXY. Yes, yes, super uber sexy. You can call me crazy now. Squeals.

-Sunday(Yesterday)-

Mayning's house, with me, Cady and Xueqin. We played games. thats about it.

-Today-

The only thing I'm really going into detail about. Me and Thurston went back to Nanhua cuz last week's production of the "Communicating with Patients and Visitors; A Guide Prepared Especially for Jamiyah Nursing Home" was epic screwed and staticky, so we had to remake one. Omg, today was epic (Y). I think me and Thurston did fabulously. Anyway, he was real nice to pei me to have lunch in the canteen after that, we met Carissa and we talked a bit. Then she disappeared into non-living, and me and Thurston were talking as hell again. Hahah, he's a real nice guy, I guess. He's almost as good as my best friend, can get. Ahem, Edward. :D Yes, Edward, I love you. You're the bestest of all friends, a girl like me can ever want and get. I can't count the number of things you did for me, already. I just wanted to tell you that, I know that you know that I know that you know that I will absolutely, positively, irrevocably miss you when you're gone.

And no, you must come back to visit me, you little bastard :D. Thank you so much. So very much, thanks to you, I, on a whole, didn't feel very lonely. I'll need someone to replace you, your-always-being-there-ness is not comparable to anyone, however, I'd just like you to know. :D. Anyway, back to today. So yeah, I took bus home myself. The end. What a boring, usual day.

i got your emails, you just don't get females, now do you?

2009-11-24T06:08:00.000-08:00

LOL. today was FUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN. Omg, I'mma like, totally retardedly hyped up for no effing reason. But I kinda thought today was "fun". And so, yours truly's gonna go in detail now. Okay, met Charmian at Woodlands mrt, totally 30 minutes late :D. Met Charmian, then took Mrt. LOL. Did i mention that I took MRT to clementi instead of woodlands, by accident? Shock, Horrors, Disasters. The Curse Of Nanhua High :O. Anyway, yeapps. Okay, took MRT to Kovan, to meet Leonard there. On the MRT, we camwhored a little bit using the cool art of physics; Reflection! :D :D :D.

YAY. Extra guy there. sorry uhs.

yes this picture is epic nice :D.

quite good too luhs :D

Okay, when we reached Kovan, I called Leonard and we met him at the MRT station. Charmian then gave me a case of seriously-horrible-unstoppable laughing fits, such that Leonard was totally embarrassed to be seen out with us. LOL. We walked around, trying to find a vegetarian stall which suits yours truly's vegetarian apetite. There was NOTHING. Apart from some super disgusting kopitiam that Leonard wanted to eat at.

(Note: guys are cheapskates D:)

Okay, anyway, we found McDonald's. Shitty, LOL. All MEAT. Bloody hellz. Then Leonard asked the counter a stupid question;

"DO YOU HAVE VEGEBURGERZ?"

LOL. Obviously, the counter went boomz.

"Sorry, no, how about a lovely Fillet O Fish?"

Uhuuuuuuuum. FISH is meat, ewz. Anyway, I bought that thingy, and gave the fish to Leonard. So practically, my lunch was, the burger's bun, the cheese and french fries. Lovely, I'm sure. Charmian had a more fulfilling, yet evil meaty lunch. Gross. And she kept making me laugh like shit over the burger. For the lamest reasons ever, and Leonard was totally humiliated. Sorry uhs! Hahah, and his friends arrived like 30 minutes later. 5 other guys, and with leonard = 6 guys. Then me and Charmian were feeling damn extra, so we went to the toilet, and met Leonard outside on his way to the gentz. LOL. Then we went back and camwhored outside McDonalds, cuz we were shy people to talk to the dudez.

seeeee cute Charmian :D.

MEEEEEE :D LOL.

Anyway, went inside when Leonard came out and told us about him forgetting his socks for bowling(so did I, luckily Charmian brought an extra pair for me, LOVE.) LOL, I forgot to mention that Charmian and my's main reason for staying outside was to see the SUPER MACHO AND HOT basketballers at the opposite side of the road. We were waving at them, LOL. But they didn't see la dey. Then Leonard kept insulting the fairer gender by saying,

"Girls are weird peoplez."

Right, LOL. Just because they're from St. Andrew's, totally doesn't give them a right to insult us. HMFF. Alright, we went to the bowling place. EPIC FAILZ. I kept screwing up, but I got a couple of strikes, and a lot of spares I think :X. But them guys were pro, especially the ones that weren't playing against us. Me and Charmian were against Leonard and Yanting(?). Sorry, I didn't really get his name. That Yanting guy kept hitting one pin on purpose, LOL. Charmian and me got epic lots of gutters at the first round. And we were giggling and talking lots of shit. I know Charmian much much much better now ;D. Hahaha, its cool going out with her, LOL. Anyway, wth, I'm going to murder her for taking my bowling pictures. Second round was okay, LOL, Charmian won cuz we weren't exactly concentrating. Heeh, Charmian, I'mma not giving you credit. Third round was epic, I got a couple of strikes and lots of spares. Then at the end, wth, the guys were like shouting when I was gonna hit again,
"hit gutter, hit gutter, hit gutter." Funny huhs. I'mma wanna kick some balls. LOL. Stupid St.Andrewsians. >:P

cool drama jacket :O. uncool and unglam me. Stupid mianbao.

walaooooooooooooooooooooooooo. my socks pull until so high and nerdy. LOL. this shot was taken right before I hit a gutter. LOL. K, nevermind.(OMG I SEE MY LEG MUSCLES :D)

Charmian Kua, I'mma gonna kill you. Anyway, we also took some shots of the guys, but we can't see their faces. So it's officially proclaimed that Charmian is a failure at photography. See the below pictures :D. And judge for yourself.

See, the yellow shirt dude's Leonard. Unglam butt-shot! :D

LOL. We all have the same cool shoes. LOL.

Anyway, bowled 3 times, holy epic mama, it costed us $8.10 each. But the other group was worse, cuz they played 4 times. $2.70x4 = $10.80 each. Wow, am I glad we didn't play that much. Then that Hongjun guy(Charmian's friend, coincidentally) was complaining like siao. Oh, yeah, me and Charmian went to the toilet to camwhore. But only one nice picture, uhhs.

Okay, not really that clear, but its obviously the toilet :D.

Went out there, the guys were complaining like shit about how expensive it was(heyyyyy, proves my cheapskate point.) And they're like, SO CHILDISH, UGH. Its so prude, of me to say so, but yes. They are. They were talking about gang-banging the dude behind the counter,

(another note: st. andrew guys are DAMN innocent. I think they don't even know what gang-bang means, they simply think it means like a whole gang beating up some guy.)

and about dipping the money in urine before giving it to that guy(?!) Honestly, we can do better, so much better darlings. So love, I suggest that you stop being so immature, yes, love? ((;. Me and Charmian were like talking about how "high-class" we were, and how childish they were. LOL. After bowling, we took MRT to Leonard's house. Leonard ate half of my cheese balls, cuz we couldn't finish it. Epic waste, he took the whole packet and poured it down his throat. Anyway, on the MRT, we were trying to segregate ourselves from the childish little boys next door. LOL. (most of which happens to be taller than me? LOL) When we reached Serangoon, the guys totally epic chionged away from us. We heck cared them, thats so us :D. Me and Charmian were singing(okay, mouthing) song lyrics, and when we caught up with them, Leonard was trying to unsuccessfully gaily(oh yeah, they have a problem with the word, "gay" too.) imitate us. We don't care, right? Ugh. We wanted to sing "fuck you" to him, but I couldn't find the song, so we had to make do with, "If You Seek Amy". LOL.

"Love me hate me, say what you want about me, but all of the boys and all of the girls are begging to if you seek amy."

LOL, Charmian was like saying, we shouldn't SING THIS in front of THEM. :X So mean luhs, actually they weren't that bad. Leonard + Yanting = quite sociable to me, I think? Anyway, reached, and went to Leonard's house(omg epic big TV(?) :O) to get the table tennis stuff plus the football. o.o

Charmian and me = tired. LOL. Guys = not tired. LOL. They started playing soccer, and kept insisting for me and Charmian to play. We were sitting down, emoing, listening to music, and talking lots of cock. We started playing, "Fuck You" like the guys even heard anyway. Plus, I noticed that their playing was much less rougher when compared to the Nanhua guys. Sucks. :P. But they were quite good, I guess. After like 20 minutes of playing, we went to play table tennis at an air conditioned place. Apparently it was booked, but Leonard with his, self-proclaimed shuai face got the 2 ladies upstairs to let us play. Went up, the 6 guys were playing. Me and Charmian were sitting down and making random comments and talking talking talking, which earned us weird looks from the guys, but we honestly didn't want to play. LOL. We were damn random, and bored, so we were talking about everything under the sun, and it was damn fun :D. Let me post some of our conversations. LOL.

Charmian: Let's talk about Apples, Audrey.

Me: Okay. Apples are red.

Charmian: And?

Me: Apples are red, big and juicy.

Leonard(extra): They can be green too.

Me: Oh, right, Granny Smiths.

LOL. We failed. :X. We were talking about the best all-boy school too :D. Obviously, the st. andrews people were complimenting themselves for that. Ahem, NO they are wrong! D: Its HWACHONG K. :D :D :D. And the guys there went like, wtf? When I said Hwachong. They were like,

"Hwachong is a nerd school, ugh."

Then I went,

"NO THERE'RE HOT GUYS THERE OKAY :D."

Then they went,

"EW, they do your homework for you is it."

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL. Damn epic la dey. But its a damn cool idea, hahah. But, its true. Hwachong is a damn epic cool school kay, St. Andrews will never ever ever beat them D:.

Anyway, we then left to wait for Charmian's super uber nice parents, who agreed to fetch me to Woodlands MRT station. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee, so nice :D. We camwhored right outside the Lorong Chuan MRT station. Charmian's idea. So now, let me let the pictures speak a thousand words to you, darlings. :)

K, wth, Unglam. LOL. Peoplez like to take such photos of me. Let me let you compare to another picture.

SEEEEEEEEEE. damn. LOL. Anyway, back to me and Charmian's camwhoring.

K see Charmian so cute :P.

GANGBANG. LOL CHARMIAN. HAHAHA.

I had to hold the camera so we had to make do with a triangle. LOL.

YAY I IS LIKE MYSELF HERE ONLY. LOL.

cute charmiannnnnnn :D Alliteration!

Charmian's watch, and my sex bands. Okay, let's call them bangles.

yayz I like this picture too :D. Fionaaaaaaaaa :D

Anyway, I can conclude that we kinda had a fun time yesterday :D. Looking forward for more of such outings, especially with Charmian! Hahah.

Note: Gym next week with Charmian and Valerie(?)

You know you love me,

♥Audrey.

i did not know how he felt; it wasn't easy.

2009-11-21T07:21:00.000-08:00

What. The. Hell. -_-. I'm either going to drown in my own waves of anger, or scream out in lugubriosity alright. I've had it with you already. You are so damn bloody conceited, everything's either about you, or the people you care for right? I don't bloody want to talk, because, you are uncaring. For me, as far as I know. I don't care, don't give a shit, about people that don't give a shit about me either. Honestly you think I wanna talk to you about the people you like? Fuck off, motherfuckingbitch.

I don't need you. Or her. So just, go away. Stop ruining my goddamned life already. I have my friends you know. I don't need you. So goodbye. For 10 seconds or so, I was actually fooled by your bloody antics. Now I know. Goodbye.

On a lighter note, Audrey has decided to put all his shit, and him, behind me. Therefore no more emo posts up ahead! ((: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Shit. Zonghan just told me that Joel is going to be in the same class as us next year. WTBLOODYDAMN?!!!!!?!?!!??!?!?! I argue with him everydamn lesson luhs! hahaha. Ohmygod. Mr Gan. Please. I beg you. Throw Joel out. I beg you. I is still begging. Gosh, Mr Gan has got to be crazy. He's putting me and Joel in the same classroom. SCREAMS. Okay, I think i'm being too overexcited about it. Joel is kinda nice, to us, but not to Mr Gan. So I is gonna take this good chance to suck up to Mr Gan. LOL. I is such a bitch sometimes ((;

LOL. I can't say how happy I might be to see newtonapple peoples again. really. everyone there is as nice and sociable as me. Thanks, gosh, I totally know that everyone loves me. I mean, what's there not to love right! Hahah. LOL. Cady's going hyper, cuz 1.China bans Facebook. 2. China bans blogger. 3. China bans youtube. 4. She's going to runescape 24/7 to talk to her beloved bready :D. okay, anyway, today's tuition was funner than usual. we kept spamming letters. we as in me and christalle. talked to jiahui, gloria and shilei a bit too D:. LOL.

Okay, I is now bored. So I shall paste random msn histories. especially the one with zonghan. I went siao over Joel Lim, HOLYCRAP :X.

Messenger Plus! Chat Log

Session Start: Sunday, November 22, 2009

♥Audrey;;:;{proclamation of emancipation; oh dear lord.] (auderay@hotmail.com)
Zong Han (leezh96@hotmail.com)

(5:24 AM) Zong Han:	so we are going to same maths class lols
(5:24 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	huh howz you know
(5:25 AM) Zong Han:	should be if im not wrong
(5:25 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	sunday rights.
(5:25 AM) Zong Han:	yup
(5:25 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	greatz{!}
(5:25 AM) Zong Han:	lols
(5:25 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL
(5:25 AM) Zong Han:	joel in oso lols
(5:25 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	OMG. please not that joel as in the one
(5:25 AM) Zong Han:	unless he change ]lols
(5:25 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	mr gan doesn't like?
(5:25 AM) Zong Han:	yup lols
(5:26 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	btw how you know
(5:26 AM) Zong Han:	k
(5:26 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	NOOOOOOO
(5:26 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL. who else ehs
(5:26 AM) Zong Han:	not vry sure quite some time already lols
(5:26 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	aww man k its starts when uhz
(5:26 AM) Zong Han:	december 13 i think
(5:27 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL. i'm not looking forward to it bahz. D; are youz?
(5:27 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	hahah agreed xD
(5:28 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	k see you soon luhs.

LOL. I is so damn gay. K now I shall upload my conver with cady.

Session Start: Sunday, November 22, 2009

♥Audrey;;:;{proclamation of emancipation; oh dear lord.] (auderay@hotmail.com)
cady;; merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream. (cady_tay1996@hotmail.com)

(5:35 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	O.O YOU CAN COME ONLINE? O.O
(5:35 AM) cady;; merrily,:	why not o.o
(5:36 AM)	cady;; merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream. has changed his/her personal message to "in chongqing now 8D"
(5:36 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	idk maybe cuz you is in china now?
(5:36 AM) cady;; merrily,:	stil can connect to internet what i brought my lappy 8D
(5:36 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL CHEY wowz so pro k
(5:36 AM) cady;; merrily,:	but worst thing = CHINA BLOCKS FB
(5:36 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	yeah i heard YOU CAN'T SURVIVE LE D:
(5:37 AM) cady;; merrily,:	daaaa-mn
(5:37 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	why china so bad we miss out all the hot china dudz
(5:37 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	actually is only block in some parts of china xP
(5:38 AM) cady;; merrily,:	CHINA BLOCKS BLOGGER argh how do i survive
(5:38 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	china no life play runescape LOL
(5:38 AM) cady;; merrily,:	LOL GOOD IDEA
(5:38 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	NOOOOO I WAS KIDDING LOL
(5:38 AM) cady;; merrily,:	wait lemme test if they blocked itl
(5:38 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	hope not
(5:39 AM) cady;; merrily,:	HAHAHHA HAHHAHAHAA YES THEY DIDNT BLOCK! (:
(5:39 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	NOO AHAAAHAHHA
(5:39 AM) cady;; merrily,:	YES YES YES my life isnt over (: china blocked youtube.
(5:40 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL fail
(5:40 AM) cady;; merrily,:	die alr die alr.
(5:40 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL i can't live for 1 day without fb and youtube nozzzz
(5:42 AM)	cady;; merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream. has changed his/her name to "cady;; zomg, china blocked fb, blogger, youtube. HOW TO SURVIVE."
(5:42 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	i need fb T^T I NEED BLOGGER I CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT BLOGGER GEEZ
(5:42 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL I CAN'T EITHERRRR ITS MY LIFE
(5:43 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	): me is dying idk what to do
(5:43 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	play runescape
(5:43 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	i shall rs 24/7 then lol
(5:43 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL WTH
(5:43 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	great minds think alike.
(5:43 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	THATS STUPID :X noz AH
(5:43 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	i know your hidden intentions ;D you is gnna spam bready LOL
(5:44 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	LOL NO EH ): THYE BLOCKED YT HOW AM I GONNA TALK TO HIM LOL
(5:44 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	uh runescape chat or msn LOL
(5:45 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	cant msn 24/7 what damn sian
(5:45 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	why not LOL
(5:46 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	sian bleah cant sms also. lalala I NEED TO BLOG ARGH figordlfjmgdlhrdh
(5:47 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	LOL K CHILL btw i is going to steal our msn history
(5:47 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	and post on my blog
(5:47 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	o.o
(5:47 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	cuz i got nothing else le. k so say hi LOL
(5:47 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	which one
(5:47 AM) ♥Audrey;;:;{proc:	this one
(5:47 AM) cady;; zomg, chi:	what what on k I IS GOING TO SLEEP ALR. NIGHT :D

birght; cold silver moon. tonight alone.....

2009-11-19T23:14:00.000-08:00

What is goddamned wrong with me? Did you know, did you know, that every single fucking day of the holidays, I cried at least once a day? Did anyone know? No. Cuz. Cuz I didn't want to waste anyone's time by bothering anyone. I tried to be nice to everyone. In fact, I made new friends a long the way. I became close to my old ones. If this was normal, I'd be happy. But its not normal, I only got to know them thanks to them caring for me, although I don't know if I deserve it anymore.
I can kid myself and tell myself that you care. When you obviously do not, albeit the fact you don't want to say it. i don't know what I did to deserve all this goddamned shit, but you obviously don't care. Thats all that matters now. It hurts you know, it fucking absolutely hurts. I went crying to so many many many people. these people all showered me with care and love and concern. But no matter how happy I try to be, I can't. I just can''t. If you were to read this, I'm sure that you'll never know that it's about you. I'm so very sure.
I can't stop crying. Why? I don't know either. All these people tried to help me. They however, can't find a solution for my damn problem. Its too complicated, they said it. It's damn unfair. Then you'll say, "Life is unfair." Thank you. My life is so fucking unfair, that if you think your life is unfair, get a life. I can't stop crying. I badly badly really want to. But it won't. The tears just keep coming and coming.
Do i deserve such? Do i, honestly? I hate this world. Screw it. It's not fair. People can think I'm a bitch, but its true. Screw you, honestly. I hate everything on this planet, especially myself. Its so........ ironic. When things wwere getting good, everything came crushing down again. Fuck you, I don't deserve this. I can't even seek comfort from him anymore. Cuz he was the one, that screwing started this cry fest.
Will this ever end? Is there a solution to my problems, honestly? I highly doubt that.

the sun is blinding.

2009-11-18T03:08:00.000-08:00

TODAY WAS FUN. HAHAHAHAHAH. Went back to school to do some english thing. Met Junyuan and Reginald. Aiya, I don't care what everyone says. They're actually very nice people. I owe them big, they actually waited for me. I was late, jesus. Okay, so apparently Reginald DID wait, but Junyuan was forced to wait cuz he was running to find Suresh, and Suresh bujiandiao. Jeez. So he was practically literally forced to wait for me. But anyway, it was a nice change to have friends. I guess. LOL. I mean, ugh, what I am saying?! I have friends, duh, but it was nice to have people waiting for me, y'know? Reginald's so sweet, gosh! Hahah.

Okay, we went up to the class to wait for Mr Chew. Jesus, he's leaving like next year, and I barely got to meet him. He seemed super uber nice though. Sigh. I could get to know and love more teachers, you know. Apparently, Mr Peter Tan's going to take over for him next year. Geez. And I got to meet Mr Tan tomorrow. I hope he's nice. Yay, I've got like Thurston and Jowell tomorrow, so no worries. However, I like Reginald over Thurston. LOL. I'm biased. I don't care. Anyway, back to the English committee thingamajig. Reginald went totally emo kia on me, but I didn't give up, so I started talking like siao to him and Junyuan. Apparently. We met some other dudes, 101, 104, 107(Reginald!). Yay. And 109 luh, me and Junyuan.

Okay, anyway, we were supposed to do Oral reading for both english and chinese(?). SO SCREWED. HAHAHAHAH. Everyone was laughing at my chinese luh. Then some dude from 101 apparently has as shitty chinese as me. Then Mr Chew pardoned him, wth. After he totally like, humiliated me. OMGGGGGG T.T. But the people there were damn cheerful. the 101 guy said that his chinese was worser than mine :D. Idk if its true, makes me feel better anyway. Thanks :D. WTH junyuan and reginald were laughing like siao, and it wasn't even funny luh. But admittedly, Reginald's chinese is real good :O.

I'm jealoussssssssss D: Reginald; I don't like you. Hahahahahah ;D.

Okay, then after that, I walked out of school with them. Then we went home. Reginald kept jabbing Junyuan's waist. LOL. He's trying to cheat on his girlf with Junyuan, omgosh! :O Then Reginald kept wrestling my wallet from me tooz. He stole my ez-link card. Goshhhh. They had a whirl of a time looking at my SUPER CUTE P6 PIC :D :D. yeah, so cute right! hahahah. Anyway, came home, smsed peoplez a bit. Looked at random facebook profiles. Laughed at cute pictures of someone :D :D :D. Then I IMed that someone. He got damn fucked. Kept insisting he wasn't cute. HAHAHAHA WHICH OF COURSE MADE HIM CUTERRRRRRR. Omg, i'm going to screamz :X :X SO CUTE LEH. Damn spastically cute. I keep reading the MSN history, cuz he's damn funny. :X

My favourite is still: TTownage says: *audrey is the best person in the world.

OMG SO SWEET I'M GOING TO START CRYING AGAIN. No, just joking. If I liked him, it would be called INCEST. You can't like someone from your own family. JESUS. THIS IS GROSSING ME OUT. But he's so cute. I swear, if he wasn't from my family, I's 101% have a crush on him. :X

we're the crowd; we're c-coming out.

2009-11-15T04:57:00.000-08:00

HAHAHAHAH. now i have the mood to post everything already. so you must get ready for prolly, a pretty long post.

-Friday-

LOL. Wentz to watch movie with myself, Jowell, Regine + seniorz. I don't remember their names. Only hanguang. LOL. Booked tickets for 2012 cuz my mom's paranoid. Then i went early to meet Jowell there with Regine. Pretttttttttttttty awkward at first. Then I got them to open up and talk like siao :D. HAHAHAH. then the seniorz came super uber late, like i was saying, "WE'RE GOING IN IN 5 MINUTES IF THEY DON'T REACH." then they arrived. LOL. coincidentalz. okay. we went in. then we sat. HAHAHAHHAH I PURPOSELY MADE REGINE SIT WITH HANGUANG. then later change seat. wtf. then we were likez passing around all the unhealthy tidbits and fattening thingyz. Horrible. I gained 1kg. For sure. After that i got freez money from them HAHAHAH. book ticketz mehz. then we went for dinner. DAMN CHEAPSKATE; $5 also cantz. Jeez. Ate some super disgusting thing which resulted in me vomitting. Thankfully, lovely regine let me drink her water :D :D OMG SHE'S JUST DAMN EPIC NICE LUH. Hahahah. I missed out a lot of funny parts LOL. :X Like me and regine runningz away. Hahahhahahahahah. If regine is reading this now: SHH DON'T TELL THEM K HAHAHAH ;D. And I also purposely left Regine sitting at the tablez with hanguang. HAHAHAHA. she told me about it in the bus on the way home, and i was laughing like hell hahahahahah ;D. Overall: Awkward, but, "fun". eh.

-Saturday(yesterday)-

boring; stupid tuition. LOL. i do not wish to go into detail.

-Sunday(today)-

yesssssssssssssss! :D this one was fun fun fun :D. Went to vivocity with mayning and Cady. :D. Watched My Sister's Keeper. Quite nicez, but 2012 was nicer(middle fingerz! :D). Its like, a tear-jerker I guess. if you like movies that is like super touching, then this is the movie for youz. Me and cady were totally squealing over Jesse Fitzgerald's actor. HOT DUDEZ :D. A rash of vivid moles/freckles, but otherwise, cute cute cute :D. ACTED BY EVAN ELLINGSON :D :D squeals!

UGHHHHHHHH ;D ;D. I thought he reminded me of Jesse McCartney at first.

DO YOU SEE THE RESEMBLANCE? :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D.

so hotz right. Omg. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah (Y)(Y)(Y)! Okay, anyway, after the movie, we went to try random clothes in random shops. LOL FAIL. HAHAHAHAHAHAHH. mayning tried on all those prom dresses thingyz. Cady and me tried on random clothes. I was trying to dress like a nerdz. Successfully failed. LOL. I look more like a prep.

In fact, I can honestly say that I think I'mma prep.

But whatever. Then we went up to the water park at vivo's rooftop, cuz Cady was insisting there was BIG BALLS there. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH. Successfully failed taking pictures with big ballz. Too big already. LOL. It sounds wrong. we sat on the itchy grass and camwhored over 100 pictures. I keep making epic gay faces with my totally unphotogenic-ity. LOL. okay. got to go. byez.

i don't quite know; how to say; how i feel.

2009-11-14T04:12:00.000-08:00

OMG. MIXED LIKE SHIT. D:. Yesterday was... "Fun". Today was... .........

Yeah, you get the idea, honey. I don't want to go into measure. Because.. I don't feel up to it. Anyway, I realized my last post was the day before Taiwan. Totally a fortnight ago or two. However my blog is still kinda alive, what a relief. Thank the beloved Cbox. Anyway. Yes. Sigh. I still miss ___ ________ the great.

OMGGGGGGGGGGG. Why why why won't the world revolve around me? I understand every single effing Fall Out Boy song, because every single song seems to tell me lots of things. It's practically my life, omg. So this post, was dedicated to Fall Out Boy and fans alike; albeit the Snow Patrol title. Sigh. Why does my life suck. Why. Sometimes I really hate myself. Sometimes, I really love myself. Now, I pity myself. And I hate the world. Waldorfworldwide -_____-(!) And anyway, apparently, Jasmine and Cordillia really want to ignore me for the rest of my life. Because I didn't go yesterday. I don't care;

FALL OUT BOY .

Alpha Dog - The leader or authority in something. Mainly, this song is about Patrick himself, who is the Alpha Dog, of FOB. And I think, he fought with another band member over some girl. "you're not the first, or the last, but you're possibly the prettiest." a chance at sweet talk. Prolly. My life sucks like that, cuz.. I don't get what I want. Ironically.
Catch Me If You Can/Procalamation Of Emancipation - I don't freaking get my freaking emancipation. And I used to take Ambien. {I can't go to sleep without Ambien.} I want to proclaim myself emancipated. D: sigh.
Switchblades And Infidelity - {Walking out on the show is walking out on you
And walking out on you's still the best thing that I ever did. } Never gonna happen, though I tried many many times.
Pretty In Punk - {I was terrified and would you mind if I sat next to you and watched you smile? So many kids but I only see you.} Hahah. That day. Wow. We spent practically the whole time talking/arguing. omg. That was the best day of my life. Although a super short time span. It was... almost 2 hours. Seemed like 5 minutes to me. I still miss you, though I must be nothing. But, let me say this. On that day, I thought... I honestly thought.. That we might have became.. Something. :/ I thought... You were.. another part of me. Seems like I thought wrong. Also, {I'm not the way you think I am, no.}
America's Suitehearts - {you could have knocked me out with a feather, i know you heard this all before but we're just hell's dreamers.}Isn't it just so obvious? Many people must like you, don't they? But, somehow, you struck me as the opposite in personality of the guy I actually thought I LOVED. you were, albeit your exterior, obviously a quieter one. obviously a shyer one. Why did I like you so?{why, why, why won't the world revolve around me? in my dreams, trees, grow all over the streets.}Yeah, my world sucks.{you can bow and pretend that you don't, don't know you're a legend. time and time and time, has a toll anyone else yeah, let my love lose again.}You're a legend, really. In my heart, and always will be. Until the day I die. Time and time and time will take many a toll on me :(.
Lullabye - Sweet, slow song. Sweet. {It doesn't matter how you feel. Life is just, a ferris wheel. It's always up and down don't make a sound..} They, simply don't care. I apologized. One stupid fucking day. And wow, you can think that I'm such a carefree happy person, can you? I'm fucking upset you fucking bitches. I apologized. I fucking wanted to go. Is it my fucking fault that I was busy?!
I Don't Care - Prolly the second newest to Alpha dog. {I don't care what you think as long as its about me, the best of us can find happiness in misery.} Like he ever would. I'm not the best, but I'm trying to be her. I'm going to find my happiness in misery. {these, friends, they don't love you. they just love your hotel suites now.} you're too rich, darling. i'm sure that... many befriended you because. somehow, i just know it. it seems like, i knew you before really. a long, long, time ago.
What A Catch, Donnie - beautiful, remixed ending. beautiful truthful lyrics. {I got troubled thoughts, and the self esteem to match, what a catch.} Yeah, so true. Thanks to nanhua. -.- {and all i can think of, is the way, i'm the one who charmed, the one who gave up on you.} I still damn like you. {they say the captain, goes down with the ship. so if the world, gives; will god go down with it?} will it?

LOL. TOO MUCH LE. GOODNIGHT :P

tonight i'm gonna let you die, cuz everything you said was fuckn' lie.

2009-11-04T01:32:00.000-08:00

LOL. Okay, there's nothing with my title okay. I was just reminiscing. That, well, I still, yeah, well, he, yeah, real, cool, yeah? Okay, never mind. I changed a lot, I realised. Since the holiday started, I've been eating less, and I've been exercising like a siaozhaborrs. I realized that I got muscles. Seriously. Nothing as extreme as six packs luhs. And I feel more fresh, during the holidays. I feel, nice, sweet, lovely and sociable. Everything which I came to not become, in Nanhua High School.

Many bimboes, much to their contrary belief that I'mma bitch, is wrong there. I'm not a bitch. I might seem rude to you, but the truth is; i'm not rude. I might say things unconsciously, so its not exactly me who's being bitchy, its my subconscious. So you have to put, the blame, on it.

Anyway, wtf, let's get down to business. There'll strictly be no more updates from this post, till a long long time. Adeus, loves. This is called, "vacation." Therefore I will only update it once I'm done :D So sorryz, honeys. I still love all of you, though. Especially Edward Tay. Cuz he is a lovely person :D. OI HAZEL. Don't say anything kay. He's just like my best friend :D.

Anyway, had drama yesterday and today. CIP/Drama. Yesterday - sian. Children's daycare centre. Super super super super antisocial children, super super super naughty children, super super super irritating children. That sucks.

Today was so much better. My heart really, really ached for those old folks. When I was leaving, I shaked like practically half of the population there's hands. Bao Cai said i was retarded D: shake so many times, LOL. But really what. It really hurt me, to see such things. I can't believe that, people actually ditched their own, parents, for some home. it's retarded, it's freaking sinful.

There was this super duper cute woman, which sang songs for me, Sara and Yulin :D. She's damn cute luhs. Her singing isn't too bad too. She's definitely one of my favs there. When I was leaving, she actually clutched my hands, and told me to come back and listen to her lovely singing. hahah, i would love to do so. during the holidays, I'll arrange for it luhs ((;. I like them, old folks, really.

Geez, maybe its cuz I understand their heartache. however, mine is in another way.

I still miss him; it's been 36 days;

you know you love me;

♥Audrey.

I like to wear something rad and loud, something that shouts "ME!", you know? boomz.

2009-11-01T07:33:00.000-08:00

Ris Low-y title. I don't hate her. I think she's fabulous. She's just like Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, only more Singaporeanized. And, honey i like that :D. She's honestly the best ever. Okay, today was damn sian. I went for Chenyun make up class cuz I was bored. LOL. Okay, technically, its cuz I didn't go yesterday. But what the hells, around there luh. I was like in a class of sec 3s/sec 2s. They damn boring seh D:. No one to talk to. I sat there and emo-ed, hahah. Apparently there's a nanhuarian there too, but I don't care do I?

Anyway, I spent like 2 hours there spam messsaging Mayning, Zestin, Fiona and Cady :P. We were talking horny stuff LOL. Hahah, i didn't mean to okay, I'm NOT a horny person, grr. I just happened to be extremely bored, alright? Okay, I think I missed out the beginning of my day. Hanguang said must sms him before 7.45 am(his flight to Hong Kong). LOL. So i super uber nice, smsed at 7.32am in the morning. Anyway, we were like practically smsing till 1am HAHAH. I FELL ASLEEP FIRST :D.

(he didn't even sleep luh, so not counted.)

Then his flight left at like around 8.15am, and adeus, he's in Hong Kong now! hahah. Then I slacked all the way till tuition luh. OH WAIT. Before that, I went to watch a movie with someone, cuz I was being forced to, homg :X. Boring movie, cute guy :D. WHOOPS. What did I just say? Homg,

Anyway, after tuition I went out with my family. To some japanese restaurant at IMM. WTF I SAW DARREN CHIN. HAHAHAH. But I'm such a shy person, I just stared at my food. When we were leaving that time, i practically jumped up and ran away. LOL. I very shy one luhs :( :(. don't be offended please. Then, we went home. And here I am. Typing out my boring day. Which was pretty fruitless, come to think of it. But, at least I managed to learn all the tingxie words for the first 3 chapters of the sec 2 keben :D. Wheeheehees :D.

So, I'm not really a very useless person after all. That you totally have to admit, ugh! :D. Anyways, I'm currently doing my research on Taiwan(i'mma going on the 5th of November till the 11th). sure to get lots of pictures for you lovelies :D. Anyway, back to the situation at hand: Here's what I found out.

Currently it's like 22 degrees celsius there; freezing! :O. Mummy, get me a leather jacket please.
They speak chinese, wtf. Sure die. My chinese is as good as shit in an ice cream cone can taste.
It has typhoons in october? :O

Okay, nvm, I'mma like damn random. I didn't really learn anything; but I do know this: I need to start packing{!}

I'll get him hard; show him what i've got.

2009-10-29T05:17:00.000-07:00

I'M. DAMN. NEUTRAL.

What a surprise, I'm usually at the extremes. Either super sad, or super happy. Today, I'm neutral. Tomorrow's the last day of school, hoorays. And my knee still hurts from the injury yesterday. I was in super uber duper pain today. Crapzxz. Anyway, today's drama was fun. I think. The games were, at any rate. Polar Bear(Like murderer) and clingcling i think. LOL. I kept becoming the runner LOL. And wtf, Ernest said i ran fast LOLOLOLOL. okay, i'm bored. bye.

those bittersweet memories;

2009-10-28T03:14:00.000-07:00

its been about 2 weeks now,

ain't seen or heard from you,

i've been missing you crazy.

how do you, how do you sleep?

i found the thingy you gave me,

it still smells just like you,

damn those sweet memories..

How do you, how do you sleep?

I can't believe you did that. I can't totally, believe, that. It's like, the information cannot be registered onto my brain. you know, i totally believe that its all my fault now. i'm so sorry, i'm so, so, so very sorry. I know, I know that i don't deserve someone such as you. But, did you know? Did you know that, 我是个很自私的人?

All I know is that, I once thought, that I loved you.

Bitch; I'm such a fucking idiot. I gave you a valentine's day gift too. Fuck. Fuck.

Stupid girl,
I should've known, I should've known
That I'm not a princess
This ain't a fairytale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood,
This is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now its too late for you and your White Horse,
To come around.

I felt like crying. At the same time, I didn't feel like crying. I don't know why. This is so, inexplainable. I don't know. I felt hatred, the first few hours i found out.. I was. So. Angry. I didn't know what to do. I was going to cry, in anger. I wanted to scream in frustration. Did you know that....

you broke my heart; and you crushed my soul. you pulled me close then you let me go. i hate you now, and it feels so good; i hate you now, never thought i would.

You utterly suck.

i can't get him off of my brain;

2009-10-26T17:45:00.000-07:00

okay, albeit my sad exterior yesterday, i did cheer up in the end. However, I woke up today and felt the sadness crushing at me again. and you know what? this sadness will never end, because.... because of something, or another. you know what, everything in my life is utterly perfect. this thing, however, utterly ruins my otherwise blissful life. and its never gonna change, unless i'm very very very lucky. but, it isn't okay? and all of you for cheering me up yesterday? maybe you shouldn't. you're all so nice that i felt like crying again. )):

my life sucks, it sure does. it will never end, till ____ ____. And, albeit the fact that ____ ____ is so effing near, it seems like an eternity to me. God, I hate it now. I'm totally filled to the brim with an extreme sense of hatred that I feel totally sadistic. Therefore I must listen to songs filled about hatred. And Sylver's I Hate You Now is perfect for the occasion :D. She really puts in lots of emotions into her songs, her hatred towards her ex boyfriend is so obvious. She's so fascinating, ohmygod. She can totally replace Mitch Albom's place as my idol already. Anyway, please recommend me good songs about hatred, it makes me happy. And yes, I'm a sadist.

Won't someone stop this song, so I won't sing along...?

I'm so emotionalized, that I feel so so so upset, that my heart so so so so hurts. And my head hurts too. I wish, I honestly wish that my life would go back to normal, wouldn't hurt so much, would be okay. I wish that I can live a normal, average life without hatred. Is it too much to ask, simply for no hatred? Simply for, simplicity? I.........

fuck you, fuck you, fuck you very very much.

2009-10-23T18:22:00.000-07:00

I'm angry like shit. Apparently, two wrongs don't make a right; yes. However, 1 wrong and 1 right doesn't make an apology either. And, I totally remember it differently from how you did, okay? And, I decided to ignore you already, since apologies don't fucking work, you fucking bastard.

Let's forget I even said the above paragraph, honeys. THERE'S TUITION TODAY, SHOCK, HORRORS, DISASTERS. Therefore, guys, be prepared to have an sms from me awaiting you in your inbox. :D. Thanks lovelies! Anyway, sianshit laaaaaaa. I go play warcraft alr, bye :D.

so if the world gives, will god go down with it?

2009-10-23T02:07:00.000-07:00

I'm sad.

I'm upset.

I'm devastated.

I'm lugubrious.

I'm melancholic.

I'm tragicomical.

I'm doleful.

I don't deserve him. Sigh.

Thats not the main reason I'm sad, by the way. I was really happy this afternoon. Now I'm suddenly emotional the second I reached home. Sucks.

I can't go to sleep without Ambien either.

i tried to make myself ask him one simple question

2009-10-19T21:12:00.000-07:00

when summer came, i knew that it was surely over.

we'd graduate and I wouldn't find a four-leaved clover.

and if he wanted me the same way that I wanted him..

there was no, there was no indication.

damn. I'm dreaming of butterflies that I can't see. and I probably will never see again. life sucks, in such a way. and ironically, of everything to dream about, they throw a dream at me which concerns him. HAHAHHAHAAHHA, but it was so adorable, ohgosh. And I was wondering if it was accurate, cuz that would mean that I would have the first 3 digits of his number HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. 913.....?

uhh, gosh, I sound really desperate. which is, true. I am desperate. and he hasn't accepted YOU-KNOW-WHAT yet D:. Damnit, gosh. accept soon, honey. this suspense is killing me. anyway, I'm really bored because I have nothing to do. I totally forgot about my xbox360, xbox, wii and psp le :X. My new hobby is watching facebook for signs of his acceptance. LOL. I'm damnnn desperate, ugh, and I'm hating it. but sometimes, I just can't help it okay. its called obssesive-compulsive.

Ugh, i'm bored like fuck. I've finished the whole sims2 on PSP LOL. Okay, that was pretty cliche, I admit. But hey, no one actually bothers reading this, do they? anyways, now, I'm totally addicted to Alphadog and What A Catch, Donnie. By Fall Out Boy ((: Omg, all their songs are nice, I swear. I love the line in "What A Catch, Donnie" where Patrick went...

and all i can think about,
is the way, i'm the one who charmed, the one who gave up on you. - Patrick Stump ♥

That line totally melts my heartttttttt omg (L)(L)(L)

i've got troubled thoughts, and the self esteem to match..

2009-10-17T22:42:00.001-07:00

Maybe I really deserved it. I'm such a fucker, but anyway, you started it. But, the fact is, as Zestin has made me see, that you have apologized. And I'm too stuck-up to admit such. So yes, screw me. But, I am really a bitch, so yes, I don't dare to apologize, to your face.

I suck, I know I do. But even a sucker has the right to apologize. But, I have the right to say the truth, and that I was hurt. Was. Now? I don't really care, honestly. So you'll be like, "if you don't care, why apologize?" cuz it's in my genetic code to be nice, ugh. Yes, I was super uber upset. Now, I'm okay.

Anyway, who cares. On a lighter note, yes,yes,yes, I had lots of fun at mayning's house on Friday! :D :D. and Edward Cullen's my new boyfriend. See :D

LOL I FAIL :/ HAHAHAHAHAH. And our super epic "edward" post. I think only me, Mayning and Cady gets it. See, this is a cool picture.

LOL. Edward. Cullen. La. D: And look at this.

FAIL! :D Epicly. But I made it, so you better not say that to my ego, bitch (:

your time has passed; they say never means never.

2009-10-17T07:50:00.000-07:00

Today, totally sucked. Apparently, I just made someone hate me. Okay, well, I'm an obnoxious, petty little bitch, therefore I am unforgiving..

Audrey, you are totally fucked up. You know that you were(still is) always this totally forgiving, totally nice person. And you've changed. Honestly, I mean, I have changed. Nowadays, I don't trust anyone much. I don't forgive and forget easily. I burst peoples' bubbles. I make people fuck me up a wall, and cry my heart out when its actually my fault. However, something that is missing is that...

I don't feel the guilt anymore. Its gone. I've turned into this totally heartless fucked up bitch, and I've changed alot. I want my old life back, albeit the fact that I was very sweet, and ugh, polite. I don't care, I just want it back. I want to take everything back, I want to apologize for what a bitch I am, but I know that its just impossible now.

I'm sorry.

this ain't a scene, its an arms race.

2009-10-13T06:47:00.000-07:00

Pardon me for my previous post. It wasn't exactly informative, much, but those videos were just so lovely, hahah. Ohmygod, I have like so much work left to study, and so little time. Therefore I'm waking up really early tomorrow to study again, just like this morning and yesterday. Only difference is that this morning Zestin didn't wake up early to SMS/STUDY too. Hahah, but who cares about that D:.

I'm going to sleep already, super short post is done, adeus. If you have any queries, please contact me @ 94839539. (RANDOM NUMBER LOLOLOL.) I anyhow type one, but then, you can call and make new friends la, hahah (:.

oh darling, i know what you're going through.

2009-10-12T22:08:00.000-07:00

OMG. I love Fall Out Boy's new music videos! Head over heels in love, like love :D. So the nice ol' me decided to share them with you.

Saturday yeah, when these open doors were open ended... ((:

Just want to be, a footnote, in someone else's happiness.. OMG, and who do we spy in this video? Brennan and Spencer from Panic! At The Disco! :O

HAHAHAHHAHAH OMG THIS VIDEO IS GOOD (Y). They killed Robert Pattinson, Zac Efron, Britney Spears, the Jonas Brothers! LOL. Epic (Y).

do you, do you really enjoy living a life so hateful?

2009-10-12T02:28:00.000-07:00

Darling. I tried my best already. However, you continued to give me negative responses. Therefore, I have to conclude that my efforts are fruitless. So I give up. Don't expect me to want to do anything with you again. ~~Sometimes, you just don't appreciate it.~~

So anyway, on a lighter note, I'm done with history! Which is to say, pretty tough. But I manage to swivel through it, with a define passing grade. Fabulous, eh? Well, okay, I'm not sure about the passing grade, so let's ~~passing grade~~. Anyway, tomorrow's Math paper, and I'm not scared. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I sound overconfident, seriously. I hope you all don't feel that I'm boastful or such, but I have read through my textbook, I looked at my old papers and see a 0% chance as to why I can't do well tomorrow.

Pardon me if I sound boastful. It was never my intention to brag, to steal it all away from you now...

Anyway, I'm bored, again, so I went to spam Valerie's wall. Okay, btw, we're having an outing to watch New Moon in AMKHUB! Omg, I just love the initials A, M, K, S. :O They stand for something cool! Hahaha. So far I've asked....

Valerie GOHHHHHH. ♥
Cady Tay. :D
May Ning :D.
Chloe Ajit.
Jasmine Tan.

Aiya, failure la. I plan to invite.......

Chloe Tay.
Farah Sabrina.
Julia Sunil.
I don't know, why don't you suggest?
AHAH CHARMIAN KUA!

LOL. I don't want too many though, so this is gonna become a major problem..

we make the same mistakes; just like friends do.

2009-10-11T06:07:00.000-07:00

Okay, this better be quick. I'm supposed to be sleeping. Cuz apparently, me and Zestin are gonna wake up at the crack of dawn tomorrow and study/sms LOL. Hahah, we are so retarded. Anyway, I think I should, seeing as I'm not done with history yet.

I can't absorb anything at this time. Its practically impossible. Therefore the waking up at the crack of dawn idea struck me very well when Zestin said he was going to do so. Well, well, well. Today's a Sunday. And it was totally boring, ugh? I spent most of my time smsing. And I studied....... A bit. Mmhmm.

Well, I'm going to wake up at the crack of dawn tomorrow; surely you know what I mean by a bit. Geez.

Anyway, it was really boring today, so I don't wish to bore you with my nonsensical boredom. Because, I am bored. LOL. So goodnight, lovelies.

i'll never get to say, what i need to say..

2009-10-09T19:52:00.000-07:00

Okay, I've decided to make it a long post, since the last few posts I've got was so totally uber short. I guess it wasn't very informative to you, lovelies; who enjoy reading about my average and overrated life. But still, it's my pleasure to see people enjoy reading about my life, ahah (:

Geez, my messenger screwed up. So I'll have to restart the computer, but I've decided to blog a bit first :D. Mozilla Firefox is getting to my head; it's lagging like hell. Therefore I've chosen to stick to Google Chrome, which I have to admit, is up to my liking for the speed. Whee. Okay, so my brother has like chinese tuition now, and he's like, in kindergarten? Poor soul; you have to admit.

But, his chinese is like so screwed, I have to admit that it is an absolete need for him to have tuition at the tender age of 5. And gosh, he's like going to Anglo-Chinese School next year. (Filled with jealousy). If I was a guy, I'd have went to such a school too. Apparently, I was borne a girl. So my dreams are dashed; but MCS wasn't bad either. I've met lovely people. The only thing that is bad; is my choice of secondary schools. My chinese + Nanhua = epic fail.

Anyway, I don't plan to ruin my brother's life. I will make him work hard and ensure that he gets into Hwa Chong Instituition at the age of 13. D: otherwise, I'll be heartbroken. Ahahahah, but I have to admit, Anglo-Chinese Independant isn't bad either. But looking at my wimpy brother, I'mma sure he'll get bullied. LOL. Just like how I bully him every other day. Well, its the thought that counts.

I'm simply prepping him for primary school, eh.

now he's gone, i'll never see him; i'll never say what i need to say.

2009-10-09T05:34:00.000-07:00

Geography paper was so cliche. But it was easy, admittedly. Hahah, then I came home and decided that I can slack a bit LOL. Then when i reached home, i was bugged by Zestin, Edward, Hanguang and Alvin on messenger. Couldn't message properly cuz I was having(still having, to tell the truth) a massive humongous migraine.

Then hanguang asked me to take care of myself z.z LOOOOOOOOOOOOL. I do take care of myself, ugh? Anyway, I'm a very insensitive person, so yeah. D: I've still got 5 exams what the hellllll D: i'm damn sad cuz of that, LOL. And I spent the whole of today slacking like hell; my mom'd be proud if I worked as hard as I slacked.

Anyway, one more thing before I go. Just to clear up stuff. D: EDWARD TAY is NOT my boyfriend. He's just a very good friend of mine; plus there really isn't anything wrong with watching movies together right ;D. I happen to be a very good friend, thats all.

i did not know how he felt, it wasn't easy. so i let him slip; let him slip away..

2009-10-08T02:20:00.000-07:00

Did he know, did he know, that he was the only one I noticed?

Ohemgee, i suddenly miss him alot HAHAHAHAHA :I Okay, I really should study now. But I decided that I need to post, cuz it will uphold my English standards. And to tell the truth, I really like my English. I can't stand it when people want me to change the way I speak. I've spoken like this since I was born, darling. Sorry about that, I'm not going to change. And I'm into speaking poison too {:

Its damn funny what, hahaha! Anyway, chinese = fail. I think. I was having a MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR Migraine while doing the paper, and I fell asleep for 5 minutes, then I shook myself awake, honestly. Stupid right. OMG I FOUND SOMEONE ON FACEBOOK. OMG OMG OMG THERE'S A 50% CHANCE ITS WHO I WAS LOOKING FOR.

He was the only one that I noticed?

2009-10-06T06:29:00.000-07:00

LOL. I have to learn tingxies for 19kes or I will suffer wrath from myself. Honestly, I'm into contradictions nowadays. And I realized that I'm pretty much really a lonely person at heart. Knew that since today's lunch time, practically if I just sit at a corner and be sad, not many'd give a fuck. Therefore this obviously proves that nanhuarians are heartless and selfish people. Mainly, I don't care, cuz I absolutely refuse to be one anymore.

I don't feel anything like the rest of them, not at all. My chinese...... The way their chinese goes, it obviously proves that they use it pretty often. And honey, the only time I used chinese, for the past 6 years was during chinese class, which is prolly like 6 hours a week only? Now they use it like how I use english, and it sucks. Not that chinese sucks, it sucks that they use chinese, and I don't understand much. And somehow, they make fun of my chinese too. Hello, my chinese sucks. But at least my english beats you, no? Stupid bitch. I won't mention her name here anyway -.-. Waste my time for what, uh?

Marks have proven, and my usage has also proven that my english is better than hers. and that her chinese is better than mine. however, she won't just admit defeat will she? Poser, ugh. I was totally fucked up already, cuz of my chinese marks. Thanks to the lovely highness, i was even more so. Thank you very very much -.-

I hate what you do, and I hate your whole crew, and please don't stay in touch. Whatever. Admitting time : I'm still happy over yesterday, wheeeeeeeee. So don't pull me down, alright. Oh yes, and we're doing a study group thingamajig tomorrow; if you wanna join, please tell me ((:

Did Edward see what in me what I saw in him? cuz it was everything.......

2009-10-05T05:27:00.001-07:00

OMG. EDWARD; I LOVE YOU.

I swear. I thought about it, and decided, I love you.

The song made me think about you, hahah. Edward - Shannon Thomas.

What a lovely song, fit for you. And what a lovely name too. I can't believe that we get along, hahah. The first time I saw you, I was preeeeeeetty sure that we were gonna end up like how me and RACC are like. Ask me about Ryan another day LOL.

EDWARD, you rock.

anyway, today was average. after school was funny like hell though, I feasted like shit, and i don't really give a damn if I grow fat or not. No thanks to Hazel for that -.-. Anyway, heck care her luhzx, PMS. Just like LOLOLOLOLOL (:. But anyway, I'm happy, and I can't believe it.

you were the last good thing, about this part of town.

2009-10-03T19:08:00.001-07:00

I've decided, and officially proclaimed to myself that my blog is practically the only place I can shout my heart out. Rooftops, get the cliche? Blah. Anyway, I'm a lonely person. Not to mention the fact that I'm bored too. So what does a person with self-satiated english vocabulary and time on her hands do? Well, technically, I should be studying, but I guess some blogging wouldn't hurt. I already know that my chinese is going to fail, anyways.

I epic wanted to watch "Fame" super Über badly. But apparently, study comes first. Which to say, I admit too. But guess what? I went out to watch Fame yesterday with a lovely friend of mine (:. Hahah, NOTE THE ITALICS, bastard! But to tell the truth, YOU were EXCEPTIONALLY nice yesterday, so I give YOU all the credit (:. Throwing in a ♥ too. Hahah. I'm nice too okayyy. :D.

Anyway, the movie was FABULOUS. There was, tons of homogeneous talent -- the tooth bleach is blinding. LOL. I like that quote. But anyway, its a sure-must-watch kinda thing. Favourite part: The audition <3.

Super nice la xD

Malik Washburn: [from trailer] I have talent.
Malik's Mom: And who one Earth told you that?
Malik Washburn: You did.

LOL! Like shit, this show is totally (Y) :D

Then, we went to my grandmere's house too. Boring like hell. :I what do you expect, yo. Oh yeah, and tuition. BLAH THIS ONE IS EPIC FAIL. Boring and a waste of time. Hahaha, i have christalle to back me up here.

Sigh, and I realized that it's Sunday...................... The first week........ D: Sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh. I'm sighing, but I'm not really that sad anymore. I'll have another chance at it, next time. And Audrey, does not plan to fail. :( If I fail, then I have to admit that I'm a failure at getting numbers. But, after all, I never had problems with numbers till him :(. Sighness.

See, my heart knows me better than I know myself. ): Cuz I know when I'm sad, I can feel the deep black pit enveloping my heart.... Its a tremendous, ominous building up, it just crawls up behind you, and you can feel the blackness enveloping you. Loneliness, thats the word for it. Loneliness. And then, you turn around. You see only the blackness. The dimness. Behind you, there's loneliness. Up ahead, there's no hope. Where would you go?

why walk while I run, away?

2009-10-02T22:17:00.001-07:00

Okay, literally, I won't lie but I have to admit that yesterday was pretty fiasco-itic. But nevertheless, it was fun... I think. LOL. Sigh. Okay, so I saw plentiful of seniors. Plentiful of seniors came too, to tell the truth. HAHAH, yayness, hanguang supported xD. Hahah, we managed to get lots of SJABers to come to play our game, and apparently hanguang thinks its fun too. Its just this boardy thingamajig, with holes. and you're supposed to blow the ball to the end without it dropping into the hole. LOL.

LOL. Here's a list of people which played our game, apparently o.o :

Hanguang.
Mr Tay.
Mr Ling.
Zheng Laoshi.
Zhan Teng(some guy from SJAB)
another guy from SJAB.

blah, my leg hurt like hell from all the walking. D: okay, no mood, adeus.

i want nobody, nobody but you :d

2009-10-01T02:38:00.000-07:00

I'm sad. I'm still sad. It has been.. 4 days. 4 days. 4 crying out loud days! T.T Its so sad, and today has made me sadder. okay, technically, i'm not that sad over that guy anymore, but yesh, still sad. sigh. TODAY WAS GAY AND STUPID AND EMBARRASSING.

We were gonna give out flyers to the sec 1s, 2s and 3s. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH T.T I SCREWED UP @ 311 and went and said, "GOOD AFTERNOON, CAN I SEE THE CLASS CHAIRMAN PLOX?" LOL. IT WAS SCREWING MORNING. Then the cher was like laughing. SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY!!!!!!!!! OMG SCREWED.

Sigh. Sure die one. SO FUCKING PAISEH!!!!!!! AHHHHHH! :I T.T CRYCRYCRYCRYCRYCRYCRY. Sigh. HAHAHA. Anyway, apart from that, we spent like 100000 hours in total pasting up screwing posters. and somehow, some IDIOT keeps tearing them down. and we think we know, who it is. Its screwed me up. Just outside 107. torn away, as in haste or in anger. and i was squatting there, about to cry luh. -.- 4 fucking posters fucking gone cuz of that. honestly, we are angry. not only me.

at least yingchang managed to lighten up the atmosphere. but it wasn't funny at all, cuz i'mma still fucking angry at whoever did such. why?! i never never never offended anyone in nanhua, AT ALL. In fact, I've treated everyone nicely, and equally. you, ugh, you bitch/bastard. I don't deserve to have such a treatment from some, some bloody child like you. so bloody immaturish, ugh. you're already sec 1(oops, what did i say?), and you want to do such things? oh please, you're just jealous.

why did you do such a thing. i never offended you, ever?

anyway, here's a list of people that might be supporting us....

JUNWEI(HOOOOORAAAAAAAY!)
YINGCHANG(WHEEE LOVED.)
HANGUANG(YEAHHHYAYHOORAYYYYY:D!)
THE DRINK STALL UNCLE (HE ROCKS LIKE HELL; I LOVE HIM ;D)
THE BOOKSHOP AUNTY (SHE ROCKS TOO, BABY :D)
every teacher i gave a leaflet to. (: esp Mr Tay and Mdm Zuraidah (:

spotlight, on me and I'm ready to break.

2009-09-29T04:02:00.000-07:00

i'm a heartbroken emo kia. :(. Sigh. I'm still regretting. and it's been 2 days already. to live with this sadness permanently, will kill me eventually. its not fair. i just, just, just, want to know him better. its not a sin. :( but then, why, why, why won't the world revolve around me? why won't trees grow all over the streets in my trees? why must he burn that freaking bridge or two, and abolish all communication. IT FUCKING HURTS K.

OKAY, I WON'T SWEAR. But i'm sad. And I tend to have untactful and self-centered friends. Therefore I cannot confide in anyone. Apart from people not from nanhua -.- what the freak right?! ugh, nanhua's so fucked up manzx. and i'm the only one saying so. thats the worst part. I'm upset, okay? Jesus. And my friends? they don't fucking care. I can only cry to myself at night, and confide in Fiona, or the few others. I'm such a lonely, friendless person.

I'm gonna study. byebye. I hope you all still find that i have a nice blog to read, albeit the fact that i suck. I go emo le. byebye.

its not you, its me.. Its not me, its YOU

2009-09-27T04:02:00.000-07:00

You're causing me unnecessary heartache, and lugubriousness. Its not your fault, to tell the truth. Just that, I can't stand it that its my fault. But, I've asked my friends. They said that it was neither my fault, nor yours. But, why then? Ever since when was it so wrong, so very wrong to get a number? To keep in touch? Don't you want to? I always had that impression that you wanted to become good friends with me, you wanted to get to know me better. I felt that way, since the first time i saw you.

I thought, you were the one for me.

But as always, I'm wrong. I know that its wrong, I knew it since..... But, why does it feel so right then? You can ask anyone who was there. It seemed so right, yet its wrong in the end. Everything is wrong, when concerned with me, yes? I don't want to be someone like that. I will forget you, i will forget everything in co-relation to you. I don't wish to see you anymore, yes.

But one thing's for sure, I've always liked you. Not that I'm going to admit to you, ever. No one'd understand this. The warm, salty tears are not of sadness, however. Its filled with, regret. Freaking regret. I never did anything to deserve such from you. But you probably don't know that you're hurting me, although you're being so nice to me. The fact that you're so nice, so sweet, makes it all the more painful.

And, why? Why is it that we didn't talk at all today? Why was it that, when we caught each other's eyes, we looked at each other for an eternity? Till I broke off.. Why was it, that I felt, that we were still meant for each other?

If love was a sin, I'd be in hell now.

don't you know who i think i am?

2009-09-22T05:33:00.000-07:00

i'm bloody fucked up. which is ironic, considering my previous post was so joyous and happy. but i'm really angry now. why won't she accept me for who i am? she's scolding me for every word that comes out of my mouth. i guess things are better off if i just shut the fuck up for the rest of my life? would she like that? i'm sure she'd be totally jocund if such a setting was to take place. i'm never good enough for you, yes i know that. I'm not the tanned, athletic, braniac beauty queen that you always wanted for a daughter. I'M SORRY, I DON'T WISH TO BE SOMEONE LIKE THAT.

I'm not a braniac(i guess tanned and athletic...), i'm not a beauty. I'm me. and i like that. whats with you? why can't you accept me for who i am? why can't you ever be proud of me? all you do is bug me, nag me, scold me, and compare me. why me?! why can't you do that to my brother? my brother, who is always so perfect to you. so cute, so handsome, so clever. i don't think so.

you, have never put my feelings into place before you said something. you asked me to shut up whenever something i say displeases you. THATS LIFE, MOM. If you don't like it, its too bad for you. My sarcasm, is..... irrevocable. I can't stop what comes out of my mouth; actually, i don't wish to. I like the way I speak. I don't give a FUCK if it sounds rude to you, cuz it isn't. Its not rude, dear mother, its my language. Its the way I was born. If you don't like it, KILL ME THEN -.-. KILL ME, HONESTLY. I'm not scared of death, there's nothing be scared about death.

Okay guys, whoever's reading this. I'm not harpering any suicidal tendencies, neither is my mom threatening to kill me. I just have to let off some air. -.-

when I put on a show, i feel the adrenaline moving through my veins

2009-09-22T03:08:00.000-07:00

OHMYGOD?! THERE'S ENGLISH ORAL TOMORROW? That was my expression just like 2 hours ago. Now I'm pretty cool, though I didn't study. Hahah. I got tips from my friends, my lovelies. Mayning, probably the best in oral(got 20/20, english oral, RAFFLES?!?!?!) and Fiona, who's cool, calm, collected and prolly a goodie in oral too.

I'M NOT GNNA LET THEM DOWN, my loves. (: I'm really happy today, LOL. Swimming, the instructer said I improved. HAHAHAHAH BUT I DON'T THINK I DID. I think I deproved, in actual fact. But if he says it, its gotta be true. It probably is, thats why I'm hurting all over now. Like drama, like Ernest taught me. When it hurts, its in the right position. LOL IT SOUNDS WRONG :X.

Anyway, today was pretty fun, in actual fact. Ryan is ACTUALLY SOCIABLE, HOLY SHIT. I cannot believe it, LOL. Though half of the time is because he wants to borrow the timetable(i prolly should print one for him; its getting on my nerves) or he wants to sing some song in his horrible voice. Then me and Jialin go all skeptical on him, and he'll suck it up like we're not being skeptical?! LOL. Obv, he isn't that thick. He's just like that, but he's nice, yes.

But heyy, i'm not gonna join any Ryan-rocks fan club, yeah? But suddenly, the class is better now. i'm not forgetting my past angers at him tho, can. Probably a little biased, it is though. Yingchang keeps insulting him, hahaha. I really have to buck up in studies soon. Thanks to Zheng laoshi for the chinese tingxie list, I will certainly try my best. (: I feel so guaikia suddenly, and I'm proud of that fact.

HOLY COW, yeah, then charmian just totally bombarded me on messenger the second I logged in, apparently her boyfriend thinks I'm pretty -.-. Which is, I don't know, to say in the least. I think I'm just average, but some of my friends seem to think I'm pretty. I don't really care, though. I'm happy with myself. (: I can be cute, pretty, ugly for all I care. Beauty's in the eyes of the beholder.

OHMYGOD. The above sounds so fucking frivolous! I'm becoming a fucking frivolous bitch, hell. HAHAHHA, influenced by my lovelies. And OMGGGGG, Elaine gave me ______'s number. I started getting an asthma attack. HAHAH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :I So scary seh! I don't even know if I should text him or something, but Fiona was like urging me to. I've not yet though.. :X

I'm a coward, after all. Okay, whatever. After swimming, went with Jaslynn, Valerie and Hazel to Mos burgerrr. Hungry like hell, the teriyaki chicken burger is (Y). Oh YES, THAT REMINDS ME. Today during recess, I was asking the auntie if I could buy "Salmon Teriyaki Rice." Its a common misconception; people tend to pronounce SALMON as SAL-mon. But its actually pronounced at SEH-MEN. Semen, LOL. Don't be sick k. I'm too pure for you. ;D.

Anyway, we had lunch there, and we were super gossipy, which is totally infringing my puritanical rights. Therefore I will abolish all gossip, from today onwards. If I'm speaking funny, please pardon es me. I'm prepping for tomorrow's oral. And I'm real fucked-screwed-up about it, thank you very much.

i'm like the ringleader, i call the shots.

2009-09-20T00:10:00.000-07:00

I'M BOREDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD. And my studying is going down. Okay, so I've almost completed History. I've started on physics. I've done literature and english. I'm currently practicing math. Home econs is OVER. So that leaves me with biology, chinese, art and geography. Gosh. But my brain is not following my instructions, grr. I'm super tired too, did i mention? I bowl over with fatigue everytime i look at any textbook. English, i guess, is pretty much easier luh.
Today is a boring day, which will prolly lead to a boring ending. Yesterday was boring too, chinese tuition grr. She's out to humiliate me, zz. Just cause my chinese is like shit, however, doesn't mean that my other subjects are like shit. You watch out, bitch. -.-. Today no maths tuition, grarh. Anyway if there had been, i'd be too bored to go for it, nee ways. I'M SO BOREDDDDD ARGHHHHH.

Yesterday's fun part(or should i say, funny) would be the part which me and hanguang had a totally lame-till-funny fight on fb z.z. The stupid biased Fortune Teller Genius, seems to only favour hanguang. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. Makes me even angrier than I am alr. Hahaha, but it was damn funny LOL. Oh yeah, and me and Max started fighting over Myo again. And Myo officially told me that he became a sexist. z.z :

Myo: U wont win

9:20pm.Audrey:i know i won't.

9:20pm.Myo: nah nee nah nee poo poo

9:20pm.Audrey:i just did that for fun

9:20pm.Myo: oh

9:20pm.Audrey: GRARH. NANANIPOOPO YOUR HEAD LA.

9:20pm.Myo: because ur a girl

9:20pm.Audrey:I AM A GIRL.why?

9:20pm.Myo:GIRL. HAH

9:20pm.Audrey:got problem?

9:20pm.Myo:nvm

9:20pm.Audrey: SEXIST HUH? tsk tsk xP.

9:20pm.Myo: all girls stick together. yea, sexist

9:21pm.Audrey: D:<. eh, how do you know Max?

9:21pm.Myo: .........

9:21pm,Audrey: 104, i think xP

9:21pm.Myo: he my fren since p3..... ya, 104. good fren, but he games too much. buy all the games. OMG OMG I WON THE WAR! I WON!

9:22pm.Audrey: woah.

9:22pm.Myo: OMFG! SO FAST

9:22pm.Audrey: so fast? o.o

9:22pm Myo: OMFG. YEA

9:22pm.Audrey:CHILL LOL.

9:22pm. Myo: MY MAFIA 104 PPL........ OMG!!!!!!!!! THEY ALL HELP ME

Audrey:104 only meh Dx

Myo:......i know i so noob

You prolly should be able to tell how BORED I am, cuz i'm posting my facebook chat history alr, like, hell. At least tomorrow got no school :/. I'm bored. I don't have anything to read, I don't have anything to play(or at least, i'm prohibited to). And, I don't have anyone to talk to nee mores. My regular correspondents are offlineeeeee! ):<>

Let's post a fantastic struggle from FFS. Between me and Max xD. Hahaha, oh yeah, there's the other struggle between me and Hanguang over Yanting, LOL.

STRUGGLE 1(LOL) :

You purchased Ng Yan Ting as a pet from Jowell Tan for $121,000. 4 days ago

Han Guang bought your pet Ng Yan Ting for $133,100. You were reimbursed $127,050 ($4,841 profit) 4 days ago
You purchased Ng Yan Ting as a pet from Han Guang for $146,410. 4 days ago
Han Guang bought your pet Ng Yan Ting for $161,051. You were reimbursed $153,730 ($5,856 profit) 4 days ago
You purchased Ng Yan Ting as a pet from Han Guang for $177,156. 4 days ago
Han Guang bought your pet Ng Yan Ting for $194,872. You were reimbursed $186,014 ($7,087 profit) 4 days ago
You purchased Ng Yan Ting as a pet from Han Guang for $214,359.
Han Guang bought your pet Ng Yan Ting for $235,795. You were reimbursed $225,077 ($8,575 profit)
You purchased Ng Yan Ting as a pet from Han Guang for $259,375.

LALALA. He gave up cuz he said got no point LOL. xP

Okay, yay, let's do struggle 2 now! xP (YOU MAY STOP READING ALR; my boredom is infectious.)

You purchased Myo Thi Ha Kyaw as a pet from Max Ho Zhi Hao for $4,978,527.
Max Ho Zhi Hao bought your pet Myo Thi Ha Kyaw for $5,476,380. You were reimbursed $5,227,453 ($199,141 profit)
You purchased Myo Thi Ha Kyaw as a pet from Max Ho Zhi Hao for $6,024,018.fit)
Max Ho Zhi Hao bought your pet Myo Thi Ha Kyaw for $6,626,420. You were reimbursed $6,325,219 ($240,961 profit)
You purchased Myo Thi Ha Kyaw as a pet from Max Ho Zhi Hao for $7,289,062. a day ago
Max Ho Zhi Hao bought your pet Myo Thi Ha Kyaw for $8,017,968. You were reimbursed $7,653,515 ($291,563 profit) a day ago
You purchased Myo Thi Ha Kyaw as a pet from Max Ho Zhi Hao for $8,819,765. a day ago
Max Ho Zhi Hao bought your pet Myo Thi Ha Kyaw for $9,701,742. You were reimbursed $9,260,753 ($352,791 profit) a day ago
You purchased Myo Thi Ha Kyaw as a pet from Max Ho Zhi Hao for $10,671,916. a day ago
Max Ho Zhi Hao bought your pet Myo Thi Ha Kyaw for $14,204,321. You were reimbursed $13,558,670 ($516,521 profit) a day ago
You purchased Myo Thi Ha Kyaw as a pet from Max Ho Zhi Hao for $15,624,753. a day ago
Max Ho Zhi Hao bought your pet Myo Thi Ha Kyaw for $17,187,228. You were reimbursed $16,405,990 ($624,990 profit) a day ago
You purchased Myo Thi Ha Kyaw as a pet from Max Ho Zhi Hao for $18,905,951. a day ago
You punched Max Ho Zhi Hao. a day ago
Max Ho Zhi Hao high fived you. a day ago
You smiled at Max Ho Zhi Hao. a day ago
Max Ho Zhi Hao danced with you. a day ago

LOOOOOOOL. Okay, bored people, unite.

hahah, the ending is super random and funny. punching, smiling, highfiving and dancing. Honestly. HAHAHA, guanquan is so freaking funny omg. He totally freaked-out and panicked like hell when I told him that I was going to ignore him for the rest of his life. And holyshit, somehow he knows who I like, although he's all the way over at SOTA?!??!!? Gawsh.

I went and PMSed like hell to him yesterday cuz he said "fuc you" to me. Ugh, he doesn't even KNOW how to spell the F word, goshes. Then I went and started spewing stuff to make it seeem as though I hurt, badly, at his insult. LOL. Then he immediately went and said, "sorry, sorry, sorry!" LOL. at least a dozen times. but I didn't say a single word to him even till he had to go. The last words he said was, "bye, sorry.." LOL. FUNNY LIKE HELL, HAHAHAHAHHA. Or maybe, i'm just sadistic at his pain.

I'm purely schadenfreude. Wheeeeeeeee, hahaha. Then after that, I went and smsed him that "i will never forgive him for the rest of his short-spanned life. Then he went like(this is word for word k, LOL.) "Aw, man, c'mon! I tell u ______'s no.?/ I no say tat word ever?/ I tell you fog's secret?/ I tell u who i like? Wat do u wan? T.T" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH I LAUGHED LIKE HELL WHEN I RECEIVED IT. and yeah, the blank is the name of a person I used to like, but nevertheless, I SHOULD NEVER HAVE TOLD HIM!!!!!! GRR.

if one thing, really means one.

2009-09-18T06:24:00.000-07:00

TODAY. WAS. EPIC :D. I'm super uber happy. Today was a success luh, can :D. My mocktail is so classic pretty, hahah. Its the only thing that I saved a picture of, cuz its too good to be true. I drank it all up, omg. But Brandon, Hazel, Jaslynn, Elaine and Shavonne drank too. Then Ziqin forced me to drink her undrinkable item ):<. Omg, I literally died, HAHAHAHAHA :D. It was practically ughhhhhh. :X

Khor Ziqin, I KILL YOU D:<. HAHAHAHA. Home econs room opposite is 311. I saw Alvin and Hanguang. I didn't wave at them. Cuz I'm a mean person. LOLOLOLOL. They saw me toooo :D. Okay, i feel guilt-ridden and bad for doing such a feat. But we were talking about something LOL. Don't ask what :D. I only remember I went and said, "no, cannot! must say, I WUV you!"

uhh, i'm such a retard. Anyway, RYAN'S COOKING = FAIL. Burnt fried rice, then the chicken soup the chicken is not even cooked -.-, seemed as though he just dipped it in for 10 seconds, then pulled it out again. HAHAHA, fail :/. Brandon's wasn't too bad, but his fried rice's superrr salty Dx. Brandon drank my INGREDIENT LOLOLOL. The soda water, he thought is a drink, then when he drank it, he CHOKED. Cuz its not meant to be drank, just like that.

Hahah, but funny la ;D. Its so cool, I enjoyed home ecs. And my set meal 'tually looks good! wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee hahah. Okay, I'm going now. Bye bye.

MUAHAHAHAH :D

2009-09-15T05:46:00.001-07:00

I'M BEING EVIL BY POSTING THIS ON MY BLOG :D. HAHAHA. its so funny, i keep laughing like siao laaaaa. :D. It was a "video" taken a long time ago before SYF. ME AND JIANYI WERE TRYING TO TAKE A PHOTO LOL. Then hazel took a video instead, therefore we post there for so damn LONG, HAHAHAHAHA. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. This is so epic, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAH. I can laugh like hell, LOLOLOLOL.

i ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ lucas grabeel.

2009-09-15T03:20:00.000-07:00

I LOVE LUCAS GRABEEL :D :D. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Isn't he the hottest, omg? yay, time to post pictures! :D. And i totally like High School Musical 1's song, bop to the top LOL. Okay, thats freaking childish. But its a nice song, with fabulous dancers. Lucas looks classic there, omg ♥!

HE SINGS, HE ACTS. OMG, my freaking idol. And he's not some dumb, frivo dude either. Omg, omg, omg. ♥♥♥♥♥. He's unbelievably human! :D. i mean, like, with his perfection, he could totally become a vampire omg. ♥. I'm going to have to check his songs out though, but I heard a couple before, and they ain't that bad. In fact, they are prettyyyyyy good. ♥. Okay, ♥♥♥♥. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. OMG! ♥♥♥♥♥.

I ♥ LUCAS GRABEEL.

Maybe he won't find out what I know

where would we be now? D:

GOOD CHARLOTTE LYRICS

"Where Would We Be Now"

I smile, you laugh, I look away

senile dementia :/

is this true, i don'tknow what to think..

epic:D

and we'll kiss the ground whenever we touch back down~

from now on, we are enemies..

no way, you're never gonna shake me.

so progress report: i am missing you to death.

gotta make you understand.....

i'm two quarters and a heart down.

he turns and says, "are you alright?"

parlez vous francais~

we'll keep stepping up, and we just won't stop~

well, i'm sorry; that he called me. and that i answered the telephone. don't you worry; i'm not with him. and when i go out tonight; i'm going home alone.

welcome to the new administration.

i've never had someone, as good for me as you.

you were the last good thing, about this part of town.

:D

the little things...

Clap until your hands hurt; standing ovations, or boos?

i only want what i can't have.

shorty,what do i do to get you home?

did he know that he was the only one, i noticed?

cuz it was everything. it was simply just, everything..

public display of affection~

oh he, oh he's so international.

ineffability ; i don't quite know, how to say, how i feel.

cuz he'll never know; if i never show, the way I feel inside...

I need your grace, to remind me, to find my own..

If I lie here, would you lie with me, and just forget the world?

i got your emails, you just don't get females, now do you?

i did not know how he felt; it wasn't easy.

Messenger Plus! Chat Log

Session Start: Sunday, November 22, 2009

Session Start: Sunday, November 22, 2009

birght; cold silver moon. tonight alone.....

the sun is blinding.

we're the crowd; we're c-coming out.

i don't quite know; how to say; how i feel.

tonight i'm gonna let you die, cuz everything you said was fuckn' lie.

I like to wear something rad and loud, something that shouts "ME!", you know? boomz.

I'll get him hard; show him what i've got.

those bittersweet memories;

you broke my heart; and you crushed my soul. you pulled me close then you let me go. i hate you now, and it feels so good; i hate you now, never thought i would.

i can't get him off of my brain;

fuck you, fuck you, fuck you very very much.

so if the world gives, will god go down with it?

i tried to make myself ask him one simple question

i've got troubled thoughts, and the self esteem to match..

your time has passed; they say never means never.

this ain't a scene, its an arms race.

oh darling, i know what you're going through.

do you, do you really enjoy living a life so hateful?

we make the same mistakes; just like friends do.

i'll never get to say, what i need to say..

now he's gone, i'll never see him; i'll never say what i need to say.

i did not know how he felt, it wasn't easy. so i let him slip; let him slip away..

He was the only one that I noticed?

Did Edward see what in me what I saw in him? cuz it was everything.......

you were the last good thing, about this part of town.

why walk while I run, away?

i want nobody, nobody but you :d

spotlight, on me and I'm ready to break.

its not you, its me.. Its not me, its YOU

don't you know who i think i am?

when I put on a show, i feel the adrenaline moving through my veins

i'm like the ringleader, i call the shots.

Myo: U wont win

9:20pm.Audrey:i know i won't.

9:20pm.Myo: nah nee nah nee poo poo

9:20pm.Audrey:i just did that for fun

9:20pm.Myo: oh

9:20pm.Audrey: GRARH. NANANIPOOPO YOUR HEAD LA.

9:20pm.Myo: because ur a girl

9:20pm.Audrey:I AM A GIRL.why?

9:20pm.Myo:GIRL. HAH

well, i'm sorry;
that he called me.
and that i answered the telephone.
don't you worry;
i'm not with him.
and when i go out tonight;
i'm going home alone.